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MainStage Irving-Las Colinas Presents IF THESE BALLS COULD TALK

One woman portraying 18 characters through song, dance, comedy and audience improv.

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MainStage Irving-Las Colinas Presents IF THESE BALLS COULD TALK Image

MainStage Irving-Las Colinas will be debuting Carolann Valentino Productions' premiere of "If These Balls Could Talk" (formerly Burnt at the Steak), a 14-time award-winning, critically acclaimed one-woman musical comedy, created and performed by New York City artist Carolann Valentino.

All performances will take place at the MainStage 222 Black Box Theatre at 222 E. Irving Blvd. Performances run October 15-17 - Friday & Saturday at 7:30 PM and Sunday at 2 PM.

"If These Balls Could Talk", a solo performance piece with 1 woman, 18 characters, 12 songs, a 40-million-dollar steakhouse and a HUGE pair of provolone balls, created and performed by Carolann Valentino. "Balls," a top musical comedy with a message, is based on a true story about a young aspiring female artist of Italian descent who leaves Texas for New York City to pursue a theatrical career.

Soon after arriving in the "Big Apple" she lands a "rare" day job managing an infamous multi-million-dollar steakhouse in the heart of Manhattan. Her experiences in this male-dominated industry teach her valuable lessons that help transform her life.

"As the stress of trying to balance a performing arts career with a day job takes its toll emotionally and physically, she finds herself faced with having to make a choice between following her dreams and holding on to the security of a six-figure salary with all the perks. Will she play it safe or take a leap of faith as suggested by her psychic mother?" Restaurant staff members and the A-list clientele provide the basis for entertainment that "sizzles."

"Carolann has the audience howling with laughter as she brilliantly morphs into 18 hilarious characters." Through song, dance, comedy and audience interaction, each show becomes a unique and spontaneous experience. The emotional honesty of Carolann's performance is a key factor in making this show such a great success. She is willing to open up and share her inner most feelings. Audience members walk away feeling happy, deeply inspired and "hungry" for more.

Theater Fans' Choice Awards
2026 Theater Fans' Choice Awards - Live Stats
Best Revival of a Play - Top 3
1. Every Brilliant Thing
29% of votes
2. Death of a Salesman
26.7% of votes
3. Oedipus
9.7% of votes

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