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4/22 @ 4:26 PM
TheOnion - [American Voices] NASA Asks For Selfies To Celebrate Earth Day http://t.co/dm7k2gCxRd #WhatDoYouThink?

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4/22 @ 3:54 PM
TheOnion - YouTube may be a failing, completely irrelevant website, but nevertheless, subscribe to our channel http://t.co/RIRAdXxFOd

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4/22 @ 3:37 PM
TheOnion - Autopsy Determines Total Loser’s Corpse Contained No Traces Of Drugs, Alcohol http://t.co/9YY2F6Drzi

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4/22 @ 3:02 PM
TheOnion - POLL: Should Illegal Immigrants Be Deported? http://t.co/Qpw2e7P52j http://t.co/I3LKpMlNIN

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4/22 @ 2:36 PM
TheOnion - FOR: Frames the balls better AGAINST: Probably have to do some paperwork http://t.co/DJn9eom1nw http://t.co/TSttFD2E7T

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4/22 @ 2:26 PM
TheOnion - "It is simply the natural cycle at work." http://t.co/h26taaCP31 http://t.co/EnvadJICpT

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4/22 @ 1:55 PM
TheOnion - Casinos Getting People To Play Longer By Telling Them Rest Of Civilization Destroyed http://t.co/u1K2JVFMcx

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4/22 @ 1:20 PM
TheOnion - Visit Home Referred To As Vacation By Parents http://t.co/Vdu7vMYHjG

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4/22 @ 1:06 PM
TheOnion - Obama: "Who knows what kind of stuff I might find? Maybe a bar of gold or maybe even a skull!" http://t.co/ViEKbsJYh1

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4/22 @ 12:52 PM
TheOnion - Obama Spends Another Night Searching Behind White House Paintings For Safes http://t.co/2jUNF2csjo http://t.co/oYGbDECBcj

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4/22 @ 12:20 PM
TheOnion - FOR: Penis tans more evenly AGAINST: Get to describe baby as “my fully intact son” http://t.co/HWQ64Z56fJ http://t.co/KfgP9noIM5

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4/22 @ 11:42 AM
TheOnion - Study: Home Rotisseries Only American Technological Field Still Advancing http://t.co/I8U0F8i4pL

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4/22 @ 11:12 AM
TheOnion - Your Horoscopes http://t.co/bHGQSjN08E http://t.co/Rpi76M5pKd

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4/22 @ 10:24 AM
TheOnion - [American Voices] “I’m sure allergy sufferers will bear this hardship with their usual stoicism.” http://t.co/ZGjSrQzHmU

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4/22 @ 9:30 AM
TheOnion - From The Archives: Supreme Court Makes Pact To Lose Virginity By End Of Year http://t.co/y2yQ8BUgGD

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4/21 @ 11:50 PM
TheOnion - Friend’s Threats To Come Visit Becoming Disturbingly More Genuine http://t.co/XqCMjFi1xK

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4/21 @ 11:00 PM
TheOnion - The Cost Of The Average ER Visit http://t.co/zgf1CfLCvO

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4/21 @ 10:30 PM
TheOnion - Report: Average American Consuming 4 Ounces Of Cheese Right Now http://t.co/iS7y5oI5KU

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4/21 @ 9:45 PM
TheOnion - White Male Privilege Squandered On Job At Best Buy http://t.co/nAVyHWKZOr

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4/21 @ 8:20 PM
TheOnion - Employee’s Meteoric Rise Through Company A Testament To Staff Turnover http://t.co/9cd1RNXyJ1

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4/21 @ 7:15 PM
TheOnion - Colorado Legalizes Medicinal Fireworks http://t.co/nY4qgx8hKN

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4/21 @ 6:25 PM
TheOnion - Do your part to contribute to the decline of our journalistic integrity by clicking on this sponsored post. http://t.co/4sq31XhGDW #SPON

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4/21 @ 5:19 PM
TheOnion - [American Voices] “Sorry, but I just don’t see people snorting things for fun.” http://t.co/lzeTfYuu5Q

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4/21 @ 4:58 PM
TheOnion - #Sponsored: Read The Onion's special coverage on "comfort," brought to you by Sanuk: http://t.co/vMT2yyX2yz

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4/21 @ 4:21 PM
TheOnion - Friend’s Threats To Come Visit Becoming Disturbingly More Genuine http://t.co/mSb72XLeeP http://t.co/WUMyF5i6sb

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4/21 @ 3:52 PM
TheOnion - Report: Average American Consuming 4 Ounces Of Cheese Right Now http://t.co/AgKg3otC2G

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4/21 @ 3:17 PM
TheOnion - White Male Privilege Squandered On Job At Best Buy http://t.co/BjhHisPCZe http://t.co/1l13e8MjUP

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4/21 @ 2:46 PM
TheOnion - The Cost Of The Average ER Visit | Did you know routine organ rotations now cost $2,500? http://t.co/SqztdGC5oQ

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4/21 @ 2:31 PM
TheOnion - "Provided enough people resign, the sky’s the limit for Mark." http://t.co/fW8HLnlUBm http://t.co/xBfiXL15Wr

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4/21 @ 2:15 PM
TheOnion - Employee’s Meteoric Rise Through Company A Testament To Staff Turnover http://t.co/hi8NhnJTHj

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4/21 @ 1:30 PM
TheOnion - Week In Review: Xylophonist Shredding It http://t.co/ydGVpZbu02 http://t.co/VaWOYWiRlC

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4/21 @ 1:10 PM
TheOnion - "Who are we to deny the ailing among us the comfort that colorful explosions can offer?" http://t.co/yYmmqg1SOA http://t.co/7g0msMDLuT

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4/21 @ 12:58 PM
TheOnion - Colorado Legalizes Medicinal Fireworks http://t.co/wkBA8UhK7r

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4/21 @ 12:34 PM
TheOnion - How To Solve A Rubik's Cube http://t.co/ehDoBh1Nv5 http://t.co/NoAuyQ6pva

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4/21 @ 11:58 AM
TheOnion - The Week In Pictures http://t.co/P4x9ENTUxd

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4/21 @ 11:32 AM
TheOnion - Editorial Cartoon: 'Degree Of Separation' http://t.co/CaBM2qGnKn

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4/21 @ 10:57 AM
TheOnion - [American Voices] Study: Casual Marijuana Use Can Still Cause Brain Abnormalities http://t.co/8Dz7OXLOjO #WhatDoYouThink?

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4/21 @ 9:45 AM
TheOnion - In Focus: Area Family Has No Idea Where Dad Gets Shirts http://t.co/nldVO89tnN

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4/20 @ 7:00 PM
TheOnion - Week In Review | Report: 14% Of Americans Now Intolerant To Word 'Gluten' http://t.co/SrNbBc2TjP

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