Diaries of an Ambitious Student: Teaching Again - Writing from the Self

I am presently an Intern for Philadelphia Young Playwrights and a freelance Teaching Artist. Last year, I submitted a play to their Annual Playwriting Festival and ended up being one of the playwrights whose work was featured in their annual New Voices Festival at Temple University. My play, I Want to Be explored what it is like to be an Autistic teen in theater and is largely based on my own experiences. This play like everything else I’ve ever written came straight from my heart. So, when my boss (our Director of Education and Programs) asked me to lead a writing workshop - I decided I wanted the theme to be writing from the self.

As I have started to unlock a more serious interest in creative writing (largely thanks to PYP,) I have found that I struggle to write when I am not writing from the self - my heart, thoughts, and experiences. My writing’s foundation is always reality even though it is still creative. Since I am preparing to teach a monologue writing workshop and it is Autism Acceptance Month, I want to reflect on what it was like to write my first play and capture elements of my experience as an Autistic person in theater.

At the center of my play is Rose, who was played by a talented 1st year student: Serenity Gonzalez. Rose is a timid, Autistic teen who is scared of being herself but learning to embrace who she truly is. To write Rose’s story well, I knew I had to channel my own experiences into my writing. I spent a lot of time trying to figure out how to capture overstimulation, panic, and the version of her that hides from the rest of the world. Once I spent enough time building her disabled experience - I dived deeper into who she was beyond that. She had to capture a life-long journey of self-discovery and confidence growth in a bit over 30 minutes, so I learned to mix stubbornness with curiosity. Fear with passion. I built a character who was a bit of me, a bit of people I’ve known, and entirely her own. By the time the play was done, Rose was someone I felt separate from but still connected to in a way that made her exactly the kind of protagonist my story needed.

Before trying to write for the stage I wrote a lot of poetry. I love writing in verse most, so my play ended up being partially in verse. I wrote mostly in verse for Rose to show the beauty and authenticity of her thoughts beyond the way she struggles to speak for herself. Through each line, Rose became more comfortable with and honest about herself. She did so while talking to her peer, Aidan (played by the wonderful Dennis Trowbride). For this play, I knew I also needed a character quite different from myself to empower Rose. Aidan therefore took inspiration from lovely people I’ve known - neurodivergent people whose experiences were different and similar in various ways. People who were confident enough in who they were to show me how life could be. My play was a bit of a thank you letter to those people. I loved drawing from my memories of them to create a character that was bold, funny, and like light in human form. 

Because Autism for me is mostly an invisible disability, I ended up adding in three characters to represent what was going on in Rose’s mind. These characters ended up being a physical representation of what I imagined would be difficult for her to express - particularly when Rose goes non-verbal. A significant element of my own Autistic experience has been needing to communicate things visually, not just verbally. Perhaps one of my favorite parts of bringing my play to life was seeing how the ensemble actresses (Maddie Fitch, Graziella Imperato, and Nyannah Walker) captured a part of Rose that was beyond words.

I love conveying what I’ve learned from life into my writing even when I am pouring these lessons into fictional stories. Serenity, Dennis, and the rest of the student cast captured what I wrote so well that people who came to the festival came to me sharing their emotional reactions and stories of their experiences and their Autistic loved ones. This to me was a reminder that powerful stories should have grounds in reality - for stories grounded in reality create connections between the characters and the readers/audience. 

Going into the workshop I’ll be leading, I want to encourage those I’m teaching to not be afraid of diving into their emotions and memories. I met my current boss at a monologue writing workshop she taught a year ago and she showed me then and throughout the process of developing my play to not be afraid of writing from the heart. It was that workshop that inspired and motivated me to write I Want to Be. Perhaps the workshop I lead (which will also be centered on writing monologues) will inspire someone else to write something for our Annual Playwriting Festival. At the very least, it will hopefully help a few teens to express themselves