Senior Year: Diving in With an Open Heart

Right outside of St. Louis, in a cute suburb called Webster Groves, is Webster University–a small liberal arts school with about 2,300 undergraduate students. Within that school is the Sargent Conservatory of Theatre Arts, founded by Peter Sargent almost sixty years ago. 

I am a senior musical theatre major at the conservatory, which the student community often abbreviates to WebCo. On my eighteenth birthday, April 18th, 2023, I committed to Webster, and since then, I have never looked back. Every year for the past four years I have stepped onto campus in August, excited to see my friends, get to work, and work on becoming a better version of myself, both personally and artistically. 

This year, when I arrived on campus to move into my apartment, things felt a little different. The idea of graduation loomed over me. For the first time, it felt completely real–at the end of this school year, I will graduate with my BFA in musical theatre. It really is a crazy thing to think about.

The future has always excited me. I knew I wanted to be an actor when I was eight years old, and since then, I have had my sights set on New York. Now, when asked where I think I’ll end up, just saying “New York City” doesn’t feel exactly right. It is a vulnerable thing to open your heart to others in hopes that they will receive your dreams, especially now that the future feels so tangible. When I was younger, it was easy to tell everyone who would listen where I hoped I would end up without feeling any doubt or nerves. Now, although my goals and ambitions have not wavered, graduation is so much closer than it has ever been before. And while it is still my dream to live in NYC, I also accept the fact that I will go wherever the work takes me. The idea of traveling all over and getting to do this vulnerable and collaborative art for many different communities is exhilarating. I am originally from Chicago and go to college in St. Louis, so I have grown to love both of the theater communities there as well, and exploring the many other cities where theater is needed and celebrated is another thing that excites me. What a beautiful gift it is that this art form is the way we have chosen to make a life. 

At Webster, our senior year curriculum in particular has proved to be invaluable thus far. At WebCo, we have morning classes up until 1pm, and then we have conservatory block Monday-Friday 1-5:20pm. Within that time each day there are three blocks of class. Sometimes you have all three blocks, and sometimes you don’t. As a senior, my schedule builds upon the curriculum that we have followed freshman-junior year. One of the many things that I love about WebCo is how intentional the curriculum is–everything builds upon each other, and if you don’t understand why something might be helpful in the moment, chances are, in the next year or so, everything will fit together like one giant puzzle.

Being a senior, my morning classes are lighter this year, which I have appreciated. I have my voice lesson once a week, a separate vocal coaching once a week, and Jazz II Advanced in our beautiful dance studio twice a week. I am enjoying the lighter mornings this semester, because I am able to make time for myself to go to the gym, be a good TA for the sophomore acting class, practice independently, and even sometimes just rest a little extra. In terms of conservatory, my schedule includes Acting, Dialects, Musical Theatre Auditions, Acting for the Camera, Mock Auditions, and Directing. We get lots of practice with both in-person auditioning and self-taping, as well as lots of information about how to take care of yourself and advocate for yourself in the industry. In acting, I just finished up working on a scene from Crimes of the Heart as Babe, a role that I also worked on my freshman year. It has been rewarding to see how my comprehension and understanding of how to embody a role has blossomed in these past four years. My classes are continuing to build my confidence, and reminding me why I chose this career in the first place: because I love it. 

So yes, I will be graduating at the end of the year. And yes, the idea that I have no idea what’s to come can be a little bit scary at times. But I didn’t pick this career for stability (obviously). I picked it because I love it, and I love the idea that my future is open-ended. It galvanizes me. It ignites me. It lights up my soul. I have been blessed with a program, professors, and peers that have challenged me, pushed me, grown with me, and fostered and molded my passion in a way that is both useful and fulfilling. I am so excited to continue to dive into my senior year with open arms and an open heart, embracing the challenges of the transitional period that my classmates and I are in.