LATE SHOW's Top Ten 'Signs Your Baseball Team Isn't Ready for the Season'

Below, check out THE "LATE SHOW" TOP TEN - "Signs Your Baseball Team Isn't Ready for the Season," as presented on the Monday, April 1 broadcast of the LATE SHOW with David Letterman, seen weeknights (11:35 PM-12:37 AM, ET/PT) on the CBS Television Network.

10. Your first baseman is so fat, he's also your second baseman.

9. Your cleanup hitter has asked to work from home.

8. Most of your players believe the uniform buttons in the back.

7. Minutes before first pitch, clubhouse kid runs to Dick's to buy bats.

6. Already planning your October vacations.

5. Most players spent off-season attempting to steal back their memorabilia.

4. Opening day giveaway is a letter of apology from the general manager.

3. Something's still not quite right with the big dance number.

2. Team doctor: Conrad Murray.

1. You're the New York Mets.

The Late Show with David Letterman is a presentation of Worldwide Pants Incorporated. Barbara Gaines, Matt Roberts, Jude Brennan, Maria Pope, Eric Stangel, Justin Stangel and Rob Burnett are the executive producers.

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