Check Out Quotables from TONIGHT SHOW STARRING JIMMY FALLON 2/6-2/9
Below, check out Quotables from TONIGHT SHOW STARRING JIMMY FALLON 2/6-2/9.
Jimmy Fallon Quotables 2.6.18
Of course, people are still excited about the Philadelphia Eagles winning their first Super Bowl! And did you know this? I read that Eagles coach Doug Pederson was coaching HIGH SCHOOL FOOTBALL just ten years ago. Which sounds crazy, until you remember that just FIVE years ago, our president was firing Clay Aiken from a TV show.
But man, the celebration got crazy back in Philly. People knocked over lamp posts, overturned a car, ran around naked, set things on fire, and that was just the mayor.
Did you see this? This made me laugh. Paul Ryan posted a tweet where he bragged about how the GOP tax bill helped a woman earn an extra $1.50 a week. He would've gotten a lot of angry letters, but nobody wanted to spend their entire bonus on a stamp.
Did you hear about this? Over the weekend "Lady Doritos" was trending. There were reports that Doritos was launching a "lady-friendly" chip that is quieter and not as orange. And if that goes well, they're gonna try to do the same thing with the president.
Jimmy Fallon Quotables 2.7.18
Did you guys hear about this? Apparently, President Trump wants to hold this big military parade in Washington. Yeah, it would have tanks, airplanes and soldiers marching. Then at the end of the parade, Trump will be like, "Wait -- where's Santa?!"
I was looking at Trump's schedule today, and I saw that he's hosting a "National Prayer Breakfast Dinner." I guess the only way you can get Trump to attend an event is by having two meals in the title. (TRUMP) "Tomorrow, I'm hosting a Charity Brunch Lunch."
But get this, you guys. The Trump administration is thinking about adding work requirements and raising rent for people living in public housing. Americans are like, "Great, let's start with the White House!"
And this was pretty cool. Elon Musk wants to send humans to Mars, so he just launched an unmanned rocket that was the biggest ever to make it into space, and he said it would either be a success or a great fireworks display - which is also what my dad says whenever he deep-fries a turkey. (DAD) "Hold onto your eyebrows!"
But the big news back on Earth is that Kylie Jenner finally announced the name of her baby! That's right, it is "Stormi" with an I. Which means her next three kids will be named "Sunny," "Cloudy," and "Chance Of Meatballs."
You guys, Valentine's Day is coming up! And I saw that two restaurants here in New York City were just named in OpenTable's "100 Most Romantic Restaurants in America." Yep, they picked the River Café in Brooklyn, and then long shot is Chili's Too at LaGuardia.
Oh, this is kinda crazy. A new study finds that McDonald's french fries could actually help cure baldness. So it's a great choice for guys: Skinny and bald, or fat and hairy?
And finally, I heard that a Girl Scout in San Diego is being investigated for selling cookies outside a marijuana dispensary. And if it's true, she'll be given the badge for "Smartest Girl Scout."
Jimmy Fallon Quotables 2.8.18
You guys, tomorrow is the start of the Winter Olympics! But some of the events are already underway - and today, the U.S. beat Russia 9 to 3 in curling! So I guess that means that Putin can rig an election, but NOT a CURLING event. (PUTIN) "I am only human."
Vice President Mike Pence will lead the U.S. delegation in Pyeongchang. While Trump will lead a delegation at P.F. Chang's. (TRUMP) "That sounds like a good plan. Let's see what my fortune cookie has to say about it..."
Guys, a lot of people are excited about this. The new movie "Fifty Shades Freed" comes out this weekend! Or as emergency rooms put it, "Oh God, not again!" (How the heck did THAT happen?)
For those that don't know, "Fifty Shades Freed" is about a woman's tortured romance with a cold billionaire. Then Melania Trump was like, (MELANIA) "Too soon!"
Jimmy Fallon Quotables 2.9.18
Tonight was the start of the Winter Olympics! Which means we get to chant "U.S.A.!" someplace besides the Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest.
Yep, tonight was the Opening Ceremony. It was a lot of fun - until Trump stood there, pointing out which countries are "S-holes." (TRUMP) "S-hole! S-hole! Nice! Never heard of that country!"
And there's tons of great athletes competing for the U.S., like Lindsey Vonn, Shaun White, and Adam Rippon. But the big winner so far is...Michael Phelps. (He's THAT good.)
I saw that Kylie Jenner's photo of her baby Stormi is now the most-liked Instagram photo ever! Yeah, it's got about 15 million likes. And when they heard that, Kim, Kendall and Khloe quietly un-liked it.
And finally, you guys. I read about a 102-year-old man who celebrated his birthday this weekend by setting the Guinness World Record for the oldest person to ride a zip-line. Which was cool, 'til he was like, (OLD) "I said I wanted a SHOE-SHINE!"