Lynnespock2
Broadway Star Joined: 5/14/04
#23re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 6:44pmCan I be in the ensemble?
Live long and prosper.
Marriage equity now!
#24re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 6:46pm
Nope, you can't, because you're a "Broadway Star."
You will have a song closely resembling "Diva's Lament" from Spamalot, only instead of being about a star who's shocked by how small her role is, it's about someone who wanted to be in the ensemble and was thrust kicking and screaming into the spotlight.
In my pants, she has burst like the music of angels, the light of the sun! --Marius Pantsmercy
PiraguaGuy2
Broadway Legend Joined: 10/10/08
#25re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 7:21pm
"BWWB: The Musical" was directed by Uwe Boll with a book by David Lindsey-Abaire and music by Cher. It played 8 previews and 1/2 a performance (the audience got together independently at intermission and elected to boycott the second act of the show) at the Lyceum Theatre. It had the following cast:
Christopher Sieber as Craig
Gregg Edelman as Rob
Cheyenne Jackson as WannaBeaFoster
Christian Borle as PiraguaGuy2
Seth Rudetsky as Trekkie2
Celia Keenan-Bolger as LizzieCurry
Taylor Hicks as Bwayfan9
Graham Phillips as wicked_beast4
Susan Blackwell as Schmerg_the_Impaler
Elaine Stritch as StageManager2
Jenna Russell as Weez
Sarah Palin as NGD2225
Baayork Lee as Jay*
Bob Martin as Mr Roxy
John Tartaglia as coolkid1776
Norm Lewis as CurtainPullDowner
Emma Zaks as Musicaltheatrefan3
Barrett Foa as adamgreer
"BWWB: The Musical" followed three days in the life of the BroadwayWorld boards, after the closing of "Wicked" has just been announced.
Musical Numbers:
1. In the Beginning/Let There Be Light: Craig and Rob
2. Legendary: The Broadway Legends
3. Closing Night Wicked Tickets in Exchange for $10, Marvelous Wonderettes Tickets and a Blowjob: coolkid1776
4. Stupid Sock: PiraguaGuy2 and Schmerg_the_Impaler
5. WICCUD IS CLOSINK: Bwayfan9, Musicaltheatrefan3, and Socks
6. Legendary (reprise): The Broadway Stars
7. Something More (than Being Obnoxious): WannaBeaFoster, StageManager2, PiraguaGuy2, CurtainPullDowner, Weez, NGD2225, and Trekkie2
8. Hey Guys/Our Messiah Has Come: J* and Company
9. We Have to Stop Him: The Socks
10. They're All Anti Semites...Guten Tag Frankfurt Deutschland: Musicaltheatrefan3
11. Never Felt this Feeling: WannaBeaFoster and J*
12. Murder In the Air: PiraguaGuy2, Schmerg_the_Impaler and Company
13. Who Shot J*: Company
14. The World We Envisioned: Craig and Rob
1. What Will Close Next/It's What J* Would Have Wanted: WannaBeaFoster and Company
2. I'll Cling to You: Weez and StageManager2
3. Guys I Still Didn't Get an Answer: coolkid1776
4. Told You So: The Broadway Legends and the LuPwners
5. Everything Coming Up's Closing: Company
6. The Way Things Were: PiraguaGuy2
7. Okay, Seriously Guys, Who Shot J*?: Company
8. Hey, What If BWWB Was a Musical?: Schmerg_the_Impaler
9. Who's Going to the Wicked Closing: Company
10. Omigod You Guys (Coolkid Killed J*!): Company
11. Laying at Rest: J*
12. Someday, Somewhere: Craig, Rob, and Company
Formerly SirNotAppearing - Joined 3/08
Updated On: 11/1/08 at 07:21 PM
Lynnespock2
Broadway Star Joined: 5/14/04
#26re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 7:28pm
I am sad. I thought I did fairly well at my audition. Maybe you remember me doing "I think Grease is great?"
Back to auditioning and waiting tables, err, teaching middle school. Show biz is a hard life!
Live long and prosper.
Marriage equity now!
Lynnespock2
Broadway Star Joined: 5/14/04
#27re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 7:28pm
Double post.
Still sad.
Live long and prosper.
Marriage equity now!
Updated On: 11/1/08 at 07:28 PM
PiraguaGuy2
Broadway Legend Joined: 10/10/08
#28re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 7:29pmWell, we're still doing open casting calls for replacements. You just didn't fit Uwe Boll's vision of the show.
Formerly SirNotAppearing - Joined 3/08
PiraguaGuy2
Broadway Legend Joined: 10/10/08
#29re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 7:29pmOH NO ITS A DOUBLE POST
Formerly SirNotAppearing - Joined 3/08
Updated On: 11/1/08 at 07:29 PM
#30re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 7:31pmSomeone decide who would play me. I could use a laugh.
#31re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 7:39pm
IDK what you look like but for some reason I imagine Jennifer Laura Thompson.
Or Faith Hill
-Benjamin
--http://www.benjaminadgate.com/
--http://www.benjaminadgate.com/
#32re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 7:40pm
Laura Bell Bundy.
(What, you said you enjoyed a laugh...)
I... wait, whaaa? Why am I singin' "Stupid Sock," boy? I try not to insult people openly whenever possible. Now impaling, that is an entirely different matter!
After much revision of the show due to the horrible audience reaction (there was another stagehands' strike that refused to back down until this monstrocity was closed), BWW: The Musical reopened shortly thereafter, kind of like "The Scarlet Pimpernel," but without Rex Smith.
Unfortunately, this production was directed by Francesca Zambello. Even more unfortunately, Schmerg_The_Impaler sang the utterly tasteless, "I'm Going To Ramble Pointlessly About Michael Ball Now For Seven Straight Minutes While Impersonating His Vibrato" as the finale of Act One, which resulted in the rest of the cast brutally killing her by chucking their Heelys at her face. She was replaced in Act Two by a unicorn.
In my pants, she has burst like the music of angels, the light of the sun! --Marius Pantsmercy
#33re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 7:41pm
More a "... the hell?" than a laugh. 
#34re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 7:55pmOkay, now Brian D'Arcy James is playing you. Congratulations!
In my pants, she has burst like the music of angels, the light of the sun! --Marius Pantsmercy
#35re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 7:57pm
I'm a role in the show!!! YAY!!! And Barrett Foa is playing me. Not too shabby.
But, I didn't get a song. 
Oh well, at least I'm in the show!!
PiraguaGuy2
Broadway Legend Joined: 10/10/08
#36re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 7:58pmWell, you're in all the "Broadway Legend" songs.
Formerly SirNotAppearing - Joined 3/08
#37re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 7:59pmDon't worry, in the re-tooled production I mentioned a few posts ago, you have your own song. It's called "If Wicked's A Marketing Excercise, It's A Pretty Dingitty-Dang Good One." I think it's to the tune of "Henry Ford" from Ragtime.
In my pants, she has burst like the music of angels, the light of the sun! --Marius Pantsmercy
PiraguaGuy2
Broadway Legend Joined: 10/10/08
#38re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 8:00pmDo I still get my eleven 'o clock solo number or was I replaced by Glenn Close?
Formerly SirNotAppearing - Joined 3/08
PiraguaGuy2
Broadway Legend Joined: 10/10/08
#39re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 8:00pmWhatever. I still have final creative control, since I'm the original producer.
Formerly SirNotAppearing - Joined 3/08
Updated On: 11/1/08 at 08:00 PM
#40re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 8:01pm
You and Glenn Close sing a duet that ends with her shooting you by a swimming pool full of tickets to the closing of "Wicked." It's very emotional, especially when the helicopter lands and the chandelier crashes and OJ Simpson rides the cherry picker.
In my pants, she has burst like the music of angels, the light of the sun! --Marius Pantsmercy
Updated On: 11/1/08 at 08:01 PM
PiraguaGuy2
Broadway Legend Joined: 10/10/08
#41re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 8:02pmDo we keep the J* murder plotline?
Formerly SirNotAppearing - Joined 3/08
#42re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 8:03pm
Can I be the understudy for coolkid, too??
PiraguaGuy2
Broadway Legend Joined: 10/10/08
#43re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 8:03pm
No, that's Brian Peppers.
You can be the WannaBeaFoster understudy.
Formerly SirNotAppearing - Joined 3/08
#44re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 8:05pmWhere am I!? I WANNA BE HEIDI BLICKENSTAFF!!
#45re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 8:05pm
Oh, yes. J* is pushed off Pride Rock by coolkid. As for the posters whose accounts have been deleted, they symbolically die at the barricades, with the mods symbolizing the National Guard. Oh yeah, and all of the sets are Woman In White style holographs.
Adamgreer, you can be the second understudy for coolkid, but the first understudy is Harvey Fierstein.
Kathy, if you're Heidi, you and I can sing "Secondary Characters" together! (Oddly, I actually look a lot like Heidi in real life. But I kind of prefer Susan.)
In my pants, she has burst like the music of angels, the light of the sun! --Marius Pantsmercy
Updated On: 11/1/08 at 08:05 PM
PiraguaGuy2
Broadway Legend Joined: 10/10/08
#46re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 8:06pmSchmerg, I still have creative control here. That's NOT how I or David Lindsay-Abaire envisioned the J* plotline.
Formerly SirNotAppearing - Joined 3/08
#47re: If BWW Were A Musical...
Posted: 11/1/08 at 8:08pmYes, but the audience didn't like it when he was eaten by a giant plant, so the ending was retooled for the film adaptation with Rick Moranis.
In my pants, she has burst like the music of angels, the light of the sun! --Marius Pantsmercy
