GREY's ANATOMY, 'She's Leaving Home', 4/30, Recap Updating LIVE!

Last week featured a Thursday that was "a beautiful day to save lives." Well, everyone's but Derek Shepherd's. After nearly a full 11 seasons of scrubbing in, Patrick Dempsey's character was killed off of the hit ABC show, and the internet exploded.
After witnessing a car accident that only cemented my previously established disgust of driving, Derek saved the lives of four strangers. It was a Derek thing to do: running around in his cuffed, dark washed jeans, being handsome and savior-like. If you watched the clock like I did, you noticed that he saved the accident victims too early, and that show creator, Shonda Rhimes, still had a half an hour to murder him. And so she did. He was driving away from the scene, fumbled to get his phone, and was hit by a semi. Clumsy irony. He had the further misfortune of having a series of terrible doctors which eventually lead to a vegetative state, and Meredith having to pull the plug,
The fans are not pleased. The Grey's Anatomy Facebook features comments such as: "Boycott Grey's!", "I won't be watching tonight; don't feel like having another primal cry," and semi coherent thoughts like, "The writer of grey need to be fired just watch it so sad they didn't need to kill off Derek off of grey pull the show off the air." You get the point. Maybe.
So Derek's dead, the fans are mad, and I'm prepping the popcorn. In tonight's episode, Meredith tells the others of his death, and many tears and bouts of hyperventilating are expected. I'm mostly excited for the post episode fall out. Grey's fans might very well be the best fans.

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"Derek is dead." Carousel of shocked faces and cue widow's faint.

Ginger Doc asked how Amelia was talking the news of her brother's death. I know Meredith's the wife, but no one thought to contact the soon-to-be-deceased's sister? There's protocol, you see. She had no idea, but don't worry, it kooks like Owen's going to push beyond the awkwardness of their breakup to tell her.
Oh, apparently "dead is dead." Thanks, Amelia. Grieving, we're all doing it wrong. Didn't Derek have about 47 siblings? Will there be cameos?

Derek's funeral. Meredith's catatonic on the couch. Where's Yang? Remember that loss? I DO.

This episode is two hours long. If it's an hour's worth of flashbacks, we're going to have a problem. I could be binging GAME OF THRONES, and I'm not being drawn into this yet.

Meredith Grey left a note before she vanished, okay? Was it on a Post-It?

Easter; that bunny suit. Poor Dr. Stephanie. I've been in that suit. It's not pretty, no matter how much you are.

Since this is live, full disclosure: Anne, the burn victim, made me think of Tommy Lee Jones in BATMAN. I could totally be watching that right now.

CI, you know, "cop talk" for confidential informant. Perhaps it's not that Callie's never seen a cop show, but that cop's don't throw out lingo like that. I feel like this guy's trying too hard to be cool. Granted, he has this contraption wrapped around his head, so he may deserve some credit. Edit: Dan. His name is Dan.

"How is what you're doing anything different than Meredith Grey?" Jackson asks as April prepares to go off for three months with Owen to do doctor-y things elsewhere. Jackson still has that beard. Maybe it was the furry straw that broke her camel's back.

A friend just messaged me: "So if everyone bails, is this the series finale; not the season finale?" Could you imagine? She also mentioned that these flashbacks could lead to a glimpse of our dearly departed George (T.R. Knight). Doubtful, but it's nice to think about.

Memorial Day. How time flies. Bailey thinks that Ben should let Jesus take the hypothetical wheel. Ben hilariously disagrees.

Things I learned during GREY'S ANATOMY: when your brother dies, you're allowed to make awkward comments about his being dead in the middle of surgery.

Fourth of July; still no sign of Meredith. At least she took her kids with her. Alex has been leaving her voicemails for months. He's not getting that recording about her voicemail being full, so we can assume she's checking the messages or at least clearing them out.

April's not coming home. Look everyone, it's another screwed up, long distance marriage.

Is this the worst or most painfully practical way to stop someone from proposing to you? And it ended with them going dutch. Richard Webber does not have a good history with women. Wait, do any of these couples have stable relationships?

There's too much happening in this episode; like a stew of potentially unimportant storylines. Where are they going with this? We still have 1:45.

Halloween. Bailey and Ben are still talking about life support. They're in the same country, so I suppose their relationship is pretty solid. Amelia is still making uncomfortable dead-brother jokes. Jo is being a doctor, and I don't think she's said anything ridiculous yet.

Thanksgiving. Jo lived in her car like Jewel. She can't cook. Meredith is alive, and so are the children. She answered her phone and was a jerk. I'm unsure as to whether my thinking that makes me insensitive. Maybe she's trying to save their lives. Maybe this entire thing is a ruse. Derek faked his death, and now the two of them are living lives as spies. Maybe I'm thinking about THE AMERICANS.

Christmas Eve. Amputation jokes and mentions of Idris Elba. #TeamBailey Why are she and Ben still discussing this? Where is her son? We should all have an "Idris Chance." Please write him onto this show. I'd pull the plug on many, many people in the name of Elba.
What's wrong with that Christmas tree?
Jackson's calling April out for bailing on their marriage. I'm sorry, was that an explosion?

Ah yes, there's Meredith. It doesn't appear that she's living in a shack somewhere.
"I wish Daddy were here." Come on Zola.
Sierra, you called that baby. I bet you're really proud of yourself.

Remember when Amelia inadvertently willed Derek to die and leave Meredith alone?

Ellis Grey, WHAT IS THAT WIG?

New Years. Jackson and April BOTH lost metaphorical legs. April's now missing.
Let that man love you, Catherine Avery.

More flashbacks featuring really solid writing. Ellis telling Meredith that she raised her to be extraordinary and that she was a failure; Meredith's face: heartstrings yanked and destroyed.

Dan is walking on his new, robot leg. Callie's weeping. Derek! April's back. It took an hour and a half, but Amelia finally lost it, and everyone was standing around looking all "let's pretend we didn't see Mommy crack a bottle over daddy's head."

"Every man I've ever loved has died; including my baby." Yikes, Amelia. She's giving a really impassioned speech, but her hair and outfit are giving me Danny Zuko-realness.

If I NEVER hear "the carousel never stops turning again," it'll be too soon. It's Grey's Tennessee Williams style and we're all on a hot tin roof.

"I had a baby. Derek is dead." Just another manic Monday.

Sometimes Derek has Cruella De Vil hair, and it was always beautiful. RIP Hair.

Meredith ran off and didn't tell anyone, had a baby, and named it after her emotionally distant mother. Okay.

Valentine's Day. "Here's my living will. Happy Valentine's!" Doctors are weird. I'm sorry, is Bailey picking a fight with him because he finally agreed to give her what she wanted? He hired Jesus as his pilot. What's the problem?

Catherine proposed to Richard and it was both incredibly aggressive, and sweet. More specifically, these doctors are weird.

"Chasing Cars" is such a pretty, depressing song.

Seeing Meredith sleep in that big, empty bed alone is a powerful enough image. They could've taken us through the grief in a much neater way. This could have been a brilliantly emotional hour of television. Instead, we got two hours of useless elements that dragged on for two hours.

Someone finally decided to yank the train wreck that is REVENGE after 4 seasons, and it was never as good as GREY'S once was. I don't know if it's a change in writers, directors, actors, or a mesh of all of that, but this is not the same show. Smother it. Pull its plug. Do not resuscitate.

What did you think of tonight's everlasting gobstopper of an episode? Did you make it through all 50 pages of my live recap? Will Amelia be able to forgive Meredith for not letting her say goodbye? Let us know your thoughts in the comments below.

Photo Credit: ABC