Review: PETER PAN, The Hydro, Glasgow

Proudly dubbed 'the world's biggest panto' it is unclear what exactly qualifies this arena production as the biggest. Audience numbers in massive venues, stage sets, special effects? Running for just three performances at Glasgow's Hydro Arena this is part of a UK tour running throughout December and January.

Boy George is the big name behind this production but another exciting addition to the lineup was Dorit Kemsley, star of The Real Housewives of Beverley Hills. She was quietly removed from the website weeks ago but still appears on all the promotional material dotted around the city. No explanation is given for her departure but she's still in the printed programmes and doing select London dates rather than the tour as initially advertised.

It's a high-tech production and a lot of the action takes place on a massive screen at the back of the stage. The video footage is of good quality but makes this a strange hybrid of theatre/cinema. Two of the Darling children (it's unclear if the quip about Michael Darling being cut because Boy George was so expensive is true) have gone to sleep after their mother has read them a bedtime story. They wake to find a boy in their room, chasing his shadow. It's Peter Pan, the boy from their story and he's taking them to Never Never Land. 

Peter is played by Jordan Conway in one of the most bizarre performances I've ever seen. Conway is aggressive with his delivery and his nasty quips about the audience make him seem more like the bad guy than the actual bad guy. Partly the victim of a dodgy script, it would appear that several lines are missed because of Conway getting himself and the rest of the cast in fits of giggles at his own tedious antics. Pantomime is often the better for it when it goes off script but in this case, it just comes off as unprofessional.

Cue the actual bad guy, Captain Hook. Now, here's where the production actually lives up to its status. Hook enters on a pirate ship that sails through the arena and it is seriously impressive. The music is a mix of original material (which isn't great) and Boy George/Culture Club classics. It's clear that a lot of the audience are here because they're Boy George fans and he is one of the few elements of this show that actually delivers. He makes for an excellent baddie and seems to be having a good time with it. 

Part of the problem with Peter Pan is that it is trying so hard to be too many things and therefore misses the mark on almost all of them. The cast are generally underwhelming actors but I suspect they were hired for their acrobatic abilities as the circus-type scenes showcase some actual skill. The script is terrible and popular panto tropes are cringeworthy. For audience participation, it's hard to really engage a crowd of this size. 

It's not a cheap evening out but you can see where the money has gone. Bigger is not always better and the real magic of panto doesn't rely on special effects. To be fair, at the end of the show they asked the audience members who hadn't escaped at the interval if they enjoyed it and the response was a definite 'yes'. The draw of Boy George was certainly enough for many people and he fulfilled his purpose.

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