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an ad for 'rough sex' on craigslist shockingly leads to violence

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Wanna Be A Foster
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joined:1/9/05
"Winning a Tony this year is like winning Best Attendance in third grade: no one will care but the winner and their mom."
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Updated On: 4/1/09 at 09:15 PM
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singtopher
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joined:12/28/05
This story disturbs me.
"If this is going to be a Christian nation that doesn't help the poor, either we have to pretend that Jesus was just as selfish as we are, or we've got to acknowledge that He commanded us to love the poor and serve the needy without condition and then admit that we just don't want to do it." -Stephen Colbert
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papalovesmambo
Broadway Legend
joined:11/4/03
if you want to play, sometimes you pay. seriously, the faith some people have in the people who would answer an ad in an online forum makes me wonder whether the species as a whole is not better off without them. isn't this really just evolution in action?

take out the sex part and imagine someone puts up an ad asking for someone to just beat them up. how can anyone be surprised if such a healthy endeavor undertaken with such clear care and preperation gets out of hand and someone ends up dead?

sorry, but if you want this type of action find a place with professionals and pay for it, or invest the time and effort in meeting someone, getting to know them and then letting them smother you. you want the anonymous thrill? you want to take a cheap shortcut to rough bliss? you're taking your life into your hands and should you lose it you have no one to blame but yourself.
r.i.p. marco, my guardian angel.

...global warming can manifest itself as heat, cool, precipitation, storms, drought, wind, or any other phenomenon, much like a shapeshifter. -- jim geraghty

pray to st. jude

i'm a sonic reducer

he was the gimmicky sort

fenchurch=mejusthavingfun=magwildwood=mmousefan=bkcollector=bradmajors=somethingtotalkabout: the fenchurch mpd collective
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Roscoe
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joined:5/15/03
>>you're taking your life into your hands and should you lose it >>you have no one to blame but yourself.

Right. Let's release the guy with the knife who did the stabbing.

We should only ever have sex with people we know and trust completely, in the holy institution of marriage. That way there can be no possibility of violence and death. Just ask Laci Peterson and Nicole Simpson.
"If they can get you asking the wrong questions, they don't have to worry about the answers." Thomas Pynchon, GRAVITY'S RAINBOW "Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." Philip K. Dick My blog: http://www.roscoewrites.blogspot.com/
Updated On: 4/2/09 at 09:26 AM
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PiraguaGuy2
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joined:10/10/08
On his site, Katehis called himself "Extremist, an Anarchist, a Sadomasochist" and said he enjoyed "long conversations, drinking, bike riding, hanging out."

It says that on my Myspace too!
Formerly SirNotAppearing - Joined 3/08
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Mister Matt
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joined:5/17/03
I get what papa is saying. The killer should be punished for his crime, but at the same time, in this particular case, the victim was playing Russian Roulette. I feel very much the same way about those who engage in meth-fueled orgies without condoms. They know the risks and they choose to ignore them.

Nobody is saying that violence doesn't happen in marriages or established relationships. Only that the risk of violence is significantly higher when advertising specifically for violent sex and meeting a stranger willing to be paid to perform it.

Roscoe - Do you truly believe that the risk of having sex with your spouse of ten years is exactly the same as that of having sex with a unknown hooker being paid $60 to engage in violence?

It's horrible what happened, but we can't pretend the victim is the same as someone who was abducted as they were walking home and then raped and murdered. This is not a "How could this have happened?" crime. I only hope it serves as a warning for others who choose to participate in these activities.
"What can you expect from a bunch of seitan worshippers?" - Reginald Tresilian
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blondebaby589
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joined:7/12/08
and said he enjoyed "long conversations, drinking, bike riding, hanging out."

Once I read the part about "long conversations" I immediately saw it turning into a bad dating ad ending with "and romantic walks on the beach".
www.tinydancer5.tumblr.com
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Phyllis Rogers Stone
Broadway Legend
joined:9/16/07
I can't help but wonder if he knew this kid was 16 when they decided to meet. Not that it excuses anything. Just curiosity.

There's nothing inherently wrong with hooking up for sex. There's nothing inherently wrong with wanting to have more ... left of center sexual proclivities fulfilled. That said, as papa and Matt have intimated, there are undoubtedly better ways of having a kink like this fulfilled then by meeting a 16 year old kid on Craigslist and paying him 60 bucks.

Yes, you can do everything "right," take all the necessary precautions, etc and still wind up ill, maimed or dead. Yes, you can argue that ANY sexual encounter can be fraught with danger, which is why it's up to each of us to perform our own risk assessment before getting involved.
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doodlenyc
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joined:11/5/04
I'm going to agree to a point with papa too, but stop well short of the "he had it coming, eventually" kind of thinking. While this scenario is extreme, it could happen to anyone meeting a stranger on Craig's list or eHarmony or a setup by a yenta.

I do agree that there is a place to fulfill any kinky desire in NYC, so why a stranger from Craig's list?

I'm also confused about what happened (the article said that more info will be coming out, whatever that means.) Was the 16 yo paid 60 bucks to beat up the newscaster or was the newscaster looking for someone to smack around during sex and the kid said okay, but regretted it and pulled a knife?
"Carson has combined his passion for helping children with his love for one of Cincinnati's favorite past times - cornhole - to create a unique and exciting event perfect for a corporate outing, entertaining clients or family fun."

"In Oz, the verb is douchifizzation." PRS

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Mister Matt
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joined:5/17/03
From the few details provided thus far, there hasn't been any mention that there was self-defense on the part of the killer. Weber was stabbed 50 times (how many times does it take?) and Katehis was later found in Weber's clothes with another weapon. It sounds as though Katehis had a propensity towards violence and that drugs were involved as well.
"What can you expect from a bunch of seitan worshippers?" - Reginald Tresilian
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doodlenyc
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joined:11/5/04
It may not say that it was self defense, but it doesnt say it wasnt either...I get that this kid was effed up, but it isnt clear that he just went to pick up 60 bucks and stab someone 50 times. There's still alot unclear about this.
"Carson has combined his passion for helping children with his love for one of Cincinnati's favorite past times - cornhole - to create a unique and exciting event perfect for a corporate outing, entertaining clients or family fun."

"In Oz, the verb is douchifizzation." PRS

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Roscoe
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joined:5/15/03
How many thousands of online-arranged hookups are there everyday, that go by peaceably and without bloody hideous death? We only ever hear about the ones that involve hideous bloody horror, and then folks get all "blame the victim and the internet."

I believe Dan Savage says it very well.

George Weber took the wrong guy home. So did Laci Peterson
"If they can get you asking the wrong questions, they don't have to worry about the answers." Thomas Pynchon, GRAVITY'S RAINBOW "Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." Philip K. Dick My blog: http://www.roscoewrites.blogspot.com/
Updated On: 4/2/09 at 11:16 AM
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papalovesmambo
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joined:11/4/03
it is his fault. he was stupid. yes, the kid's a lunatic and ought to be put down like a 23 year-old cat, but georgie brought this on himself.

i can crash a stop sign 50 times and nothing might happen, but when i crash it the 51st time and am killed by an oncoming cement truck it will be my fault. yes my family will sue the cement truck for having been going to fast, but if i had not crashed the stop sign he would not have hit me.

dan savage also says, "and it?s always a bad idea to post an offer for $60 in exchange for sex to the crowd of fakes and freaks who have overrun craigslist, as weber is reported to have done."
savage love on the cheapskate dead guy
r.i.p. marco, my guardian angel.

...global warming can manifest itself as heat, cool, precipitation, storms, drought, wind, or any other phenomenon, much like a shapeshifter. -- jim geraghty

pray to st. jude

i'm a sonic reducer

he was the gimmicky sort

fenchurch=mejusthavingfun=magwildwood=mmousefan=bkcollector=bradmajors=somethingtotalkabout: the fenchurch mpd collective
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Phyllis Rogers Stone
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joined:9/16/07
How many thousands of online-arranged hookups are there everyday, that go by peaceably and without bloody hideous death?

Many, I'd expect. But as Savage also said, "Most people who ignore my advice about safety, or hook up with cheap CL hookers, do live to tell the tale. But when it comes to realizing a fantasy that involves violence or helplessness, someone safe, sane, and expensive is more than worth the investment."

He did indeed take the wrong person home. He shouldn't have had to give his life for it. BUT I can't help but think a little forethought might have mitigated this tragedy.
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Calvin
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joined:7/27/05
Sorry, guys, but I have to somewhat side with papa on this one, too.

Yes, there are risks in any hook-up situation, just as there's a risk any time I walk from the subway to my apartment that I might be mugged. But I'd be a lot more likely to get mugged if I bought a clear plastic fanny pack and stuffed it with $100 bills. Kinda like that actor who got attacked on the A train in the early a.m. hours upon leaving JFK because he pulled out his laptop and started charging his iPhone.

It doesn't mean we shouldn't feel badly for the guy, and it doesn't mean the kid shouldn't be fully punished. But we have to acknowledge that just because everything carries a certain degree of risk that said degree is going to be the same in every situation. There are numerous ways to mitigate that risk, and this poor guy seemed to have spit in the face of every one of them.
Updated On: 4/2/09 at 11:39 AM
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Roscoe
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joined:5/15/03
To clarify--

Yeah, Weber does seem to have pretty well ignored even the most basic principles of common sense. Making yourself that vulnerable to a total stranger is just plain DUMB.



"If they can get you asking the wrong questions, they don't have to worry about the answers." Thomas Pynchon, GRAVITY'S RAINBOW "Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." Philip K. Dick My blog: http://www.roscoewrites.blogspot.com/
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Calvin
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joined:7/27/05
And to further clarify -- I'll be the first to admit that I've done some pretty dumb things in my lifetime (probably the stupidest of which involved going with a guy outside of a Philadelphia club to his white van -- yes, actually a white van) so, there but for the grace of God and all that jazz. A lot of times we forget what an ugly world it can be.
Updated On: 4/2/09 at 12:14 PM
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Mister Matt
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joined:5/17/03
God knows I've put myself in harm's way a few times in my late teens and early twenties. I try to blame it on being young and naive, but it was mostly stupidity and I would certainly have to blame myself if I was harmed as a result. Now that I'm a lot older and a little wiser, I'm a little more adept at avoiding such risky temptations and weighing the consequences. While the 16 year-old was certainly old enough to know better, youth does have a way at detaching one from reality. Weber, on the other hand, was old enough to be fully aware of what could happen. Unfortunately, I have a feeling drugs played a major role in his decision-making and perception as well as in the actions of Katehis.
"What can you expect from a bunch of seitan worshippers?" - Reginald Tresilian
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Roscoe
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joined:5/15/03
The thing that bugs me, when all is said and done, is the implication I seem to be getting from a lot of postings that the guy seems to have asked for it in some way, that he brought it on himself, that he has only himself to blame.
"If they can get you asking the wrong questions, they don't have to worry about the answers." Thomas Pynchon, GRAVITY'S RAINBOW "Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." Philip K. Dick My blog: http://www.roscoewrites.blogspot.com/
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Mister Matt
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joined:5/17/03
I'm not sure why you come to that conclusion, Roscoe, because we are not saying the man asked to be murdered or that he is the only person assigned any blame.
"What can you expect from a bunch of seitan worshippers?" - Reginald Tresilian
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ErikJ972
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joined:5/26/03
"I'm not sure why you come to that conclusion, Roscoe, because we are not saying the man asked to be murdered or that he is the only person assigned any blame."



"you want to take a cheap shortcut to rough bliss? you're taking your life into your hands and should you lose it you have no one to blame but yourself. "
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papalovesmambo
Broadway Legend
joined:11/4/03
i take full responsibility even though we all know it wasn't really my fault - see you too can sound like the president. roscoe sees a post of mine and automatically assumes a contradictory posture and interprets my post as pure and concentrated evil which must be refuted by any and all means.
r.i.p. marco, my guardian angel.

...global warming can manifest itself as heat, cool, precipitation, storms, drought, wind, or any other phenomenon, much like a shapeshifter. -- jim geraghty

pray to st. jude

i'm a sonic reducer

he was the gimmicky sort

fenchurch=mejusthavingfun=magwildwood=mmousefan=bkcollector=bradmajors=somethingtotalkabout: the fenchurch mpd collective
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Mister Matt
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joined:5/17/03
ErikJ - I read papa's post, but I took it for a generalization regarding the victim's choice. The victim has no one to blame for his choice to put himself in harm's way other than himself. I don't think papa or anyone else implied that the murderer is blameless.
"What can you expect from a bunch of seitan worshippers?" - Reginald Tresilian
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Roscoe
Broadway Legend
joined:5/15/03
Papa, only because your postings are pure and unadulterated evil which must be refuted by any and all means. I guess I brought it all on myself for reading it. I have only myself to blame.
"If they can get you asking the wrong questions, they don't have to worry about the answers." Thomas Pynchon, GRAVITY'S RAINBOW "Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." Philip K. Dick My blog: http://www.roscoewrites.blogspot.com/
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papalovesmambo
Broadway Legend
joined:11/4/03
'zackly.
r.i.p. marco, my guardian angel.

...global warming can manifest itself as heat, cool, precipitation, storms, drought, wind, or any other phenomenon, much like a shapeshifter. -- jim geraghty

pray to st. jude

i'm a sonic reducer

he was the gimmicky sort

fenchurch=mejusthavingfun=magwildwood=mmousefan=bkcollector=bradmajors=somethingtotalkabout: the fenchurch mpd collective
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Roscoe
Broadway Legend
joined:5/15/03
See? Papa agrees with me.
"If they can get you asking the wrong questions, they don't have to worry about the answers." Thomas Pynchon, GRAVITY'S RAINBOW "Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." Philip K. Dick My blog: http://www.roscoewrites.blogspot.com/

 
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