Adjenai Releases Debut Album DID IT HURT? WAS IT FUN?
The album marks Adjenai's return after a six-year hiatus, co-produced with spouse Marina Paiz.
LA alt pop / indie rock artist Adjenai has released a new full-length album, Did It Hurt? Was It Fun?
The songs on Adjenai's (they/she) album Did It Hurt? Was It Fun? began as mantras and self-soothing exercises. Adjenai was writing through grief and solitude while sleeping on a couch in suburban Florida, caretaking for a close family member with dementia. The songs weren't intended to turn into a debut album, nor were they meant to be Adjenai's artist's project re-entry point after a 6 year hiatus.
'I was writing songs to process my feelings. It wasn't until I was walking with my mom after we spread my aunt's ashes in Alaska that I said, 'I think I need to try again with my artist project. I think these songs might be for someone else to hear,'' the LA-based songwriter and musician says.
Writing for the 12-track album continued in a remote cabin in Whidbey Island woods during a residency at the women's writer nonprofit Hedgebrook. Adjenai co-produced Did It Hurt? Was It Fun? with their wife, the audio engineer, music producer, sound designer, and songwriter, Marina Paiz. Adjenai wrote all of the songs, but they and Paiz are responsible for all of the album's production and instrumentation.
Adjenai defined clear parameters and boundaries for who worked on Did It Hurt? Was It Fun? 'Anyone working on this project needed to feel like someone I'd have in my home, for a party, if they were passing through town. That is maybe the most woo woo I'll ever get,' they say laughing. Did It Hurt? Was It Fun? was mixed by Javi Cruces, a close friend of Paiz's and someone she and Adjenai went to school with. Elaine Rasnake (Clarion, Sadurn) at Daughterboard Audio handled mastering.
Did It Hurt? Was It Fun? is thoughtfully sequenced to open with 'Lost In Space,' a winsome album opener featuring airy ambience and fluttery and soulful vocals. It dates back to Adjenai's college days when they were struggling with suicidal ideation. It's the perfect place to start for an album that shows a phoenix-like rise into empowerment and self-knowledge. The track 'Silver Lining' appears in the narrative arc during the height of suffering, and, perhaps prematurely, seeks the growth Adjenai would experience after their aunt's ashes were scattered. They sing: Must be something I can learn from this/Isn't that the way pain always is? It's a R&B-ish pop song boasting stacked harmony vocals inspired by Adjenai's childhood love of early Destiny's Child. 'It was an acknowledgement of my attempt to keep my head above water, wanting every day to leave, staying every day despite it all, and trying to cling to the idea that someday there would be a good reason behind all the struggle,' they explain.
'Shame' is the kind of song you scream from a mountaintop into the valley below. It's a paired-down indie rock song with ample room for vocals that are a cathartic purging of emotion. Here, Adjenai is wrestling with her decision to stay in an emotionally abusive relationship as a 20 year old person with a 36 year old man. 'When I finally got to the other side of the relationship, I was so overwhelmed with shame. It was misplaced, so I wanted to place the blame where it was actually due,' Adjenai reveals.
Did It Hurt? Was It Fun? concludes with the delicately-hypnotic synth-pop track, 'It Only Matters If It Matters To You,' a song that expresses a sentiment the exact opposite of the album opener. It's the wise older sister of 'Lost In Space' offering some beautifully sage advice. Adjenai sings: There are no rules/There are no rules/Promise it's true (oh yeah)/It only matters if it matters to you/Matters if it matters to you. 'This song is the thesis of the record,' says Adjenai. 'It matters if you assign it value. Otherwise, it's not important.' They continue: 'I always get emotional singing this song live because of the last line, 'I know I matter if I matter to you.' For me, the point of staying alive is to love the people I love and experience everything I can with them. This is a big part of why I'm putting this album out at all.'
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