And the loser is...

[Gothampc]

Posted: 2/19/04 at 5:44pm

On all the award shows, we get to hear the winner's speech, but we never get to hear from the non-winners. So here are some thoughts from the non-winners.

Announcer:
And the winner is Kristin Chenoweth for "Wicked"

Tonya Pinkins:
Ya know what we call Kristin over at "Caroline"? We call her Grits. Ya know what grits are? Pulverized, white corn. She should enjoy her success because it won't last. Grits ain't groceries, ya know.

Idina Menzel:
You think this is a good performance. Wait and see what happens when I sprinkle itching powder in her neckbrace.

Donna Murphy:
Last week, Glennie [Close] and I were having lunch, and she told me that I should sing for Andy [Lloyd-Webber] because he had written a mega-mix ending for Sunset Boulevard and wanted to do a revival. She told me to watch out for Patti LuPone though, because Patti buys out entire performances so that nobody will be in the audience.