RECAP: The GIRLS are 'Nothing Bundt Trouble'
"That little Ewok in f****** capri pants?" Charlie asks. A pretty spot-on description, though I'm not entirely sure how he even knows the little Ewok. He's obviously upset - and it doesn't help that Audrey's left, as well.
"Nothing Bundt trouble?" Hannah asks, fork and Bundt cake in hand, as Charlie shows his true jerk-like colors afterwards. This is about the best we see of Hannah - aside from the episode's closer, an honest, 'it gets better' scene between she and Jessa in a snot-rocket bathtub. More on that later.
Jessa! Jessa gets more than 45 seconds of airtime this week - about 15 minutes, as a matter of fact. The in-laws basically get the same. Yes, the newlyweds are prepping for Thomas-John's parents to come into town for the first time since the wedding. Dinner topics: Jessa dropping out of Oberlin, Jessa going to rehab for heroin, and Thomas-John's ex-girlfriend who works for Oprah. But they're...surprisingly okay with it? They're pretty progressive. Jessa may actually fit in. Ha. Just kidding. They think she's a gold-digger.
In their first fight since marriage, Thomas-John thinks his parents might be right. "No one liked you in high school," Jessa says. "And no one likes you now." Is this marriage?
No, but it's the end of one, apparently.
"This is the worst mistake I've ever made - you are my worst nightmare," he tells her. He really does think she's sleeping with him for his money. Really. This isn't some drunken tirade where hipster-slurs are hurled back and forth - no, this is most definitely the end of their runaway, wackadoo marriage.
Jessa hits him. Thomas-John offers to buy her off - and she accepts, with one more story to add to her collection.
Jessa shows up at Hannah's. Bleary-eyed and now $11,000 richer, she climbs into the tub with her only friend as alone as she is, bath-bonding over Oasis' "Wonderwall" and a snot-rocket.