DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES Revisited: Always In Control

Previously on Desperate Housewives: Lynette and Tom's perfect new girl had a mini tiff, The Aussie Ben knows about Mike's Con past, Bree shared the note with Gaby, and the girls planned to dig up that dead guy, but some kind person did it for them.

Bree has always stayed in control, as everyone who has watched Desperate Housewives knows. I seriously believe she is the Queen of Wisteria. Starting on the car ride home from the failed body excavation, Gaby begins to freak out about the possibility of the girls in jail: Lynette would start a gang, Bree would work the kitchen, and Gabi would be some woman's bitch. Seriously, these meet ups dealing with the murder is WAY better than a game of poker, especially since Susan is usually excluded. They all settle that it was probably "cuckoo crazy" Susan and it will be up to Bree to "indirectly" confront her. This will probably be very smooth. Also, Lynette has no idea about the "I know what you did" letter yet.

"Are dad and Jane going to get married" asks Penny to Lynette who is freaking out about likely divorce AND murder. Tom and his perfect girlfriend pick Penny up to see Wicked which not only is still touring five years later but is also picking off tiny towns like Fairview. Lynette's jealous separation problem of the week is Penny. Oh and Vanessa Williams proclaims that she is more ruthless than Elphaba which I would believe. Looks like Lynette is going to fight dirty to win back Penny.

Anyway for the portfolio final, Susan literally has everything the evil art teacher doesn't want. Her work is technically proficient but totally boring, according to him. Will this finally be the episode her inner darkness shows through her work? Hopefully because every subplot with the teacher guy is basically the same.

This covering up a murder thing is cutting into Solis vacation planning time. Gabi is convinced she is going to wind up in jail. Susan is revealed to be the guardian of the two little brats but due to every housewife kind of not liking her anymore it's time to pick a new one- Gabi's choice is Bob and Lee- because they are gay and actually chose the hellish family life.
Lynette, through that famous DH manipulation, convinces Penny that Jane is tearing the family apart.

Bree walks in to find Susan talking to herself and justifying it with a man's voice inside her head telling her how bad she is. Do the other girls even know or care that Susan is in art school? Smoothly, Bree asks if Susan digs things up, obviously Susan has no idea what she is talking about. Right as Bree is about to fully explain herself, Mike comes in to explain that Ben shut down the construction site. Susan is left further in the dark.

Bob and Lee really don't want to be the guardians of the Solis monster children. They can't even remember Celia's name. To prove that the girls have grown up (Celia was scooping spagetti with a Barbie doll in a previous scene) A "let's pretend to be normal" dinner is planned the very next day.
Gaby keeps the two little devis out of school for manners and musical theatre lessons. There is a lolly pop in Celia's hair. One of the essential questions is "Who tony for best musical in 1995?" which of course was the year Sunset Boulevard won by default. Oh and Celia is sucking on the lollypop from her hair, thrown in the garbage. These girls are such winners; this dinner is going to be smashing.

Tom wants to get to the bottom of why Penny has been completely neglecting him. Lynette convincingly denies saying anything. There was even the beautiful dramatic music underscoring the lie.

And we are at ground zero (the construction site in front of the woods). It is revealed that it is Aussie's men who found the body and stored it in a storage unit. I totally thought it was going to be Zach Young, but I guess the letter question is still up in the air. Just before calling the cops about the body, Aussie confronts Bree who tells him everything in a fabulously acted scene. Unfortunately Ben leaves Bree in tears, as he can't do anything about getting rid of the body.

And now, it's time for the gay dinner. Bribing the girls with money and m&m's for each great act, the night includes inclusive prayers and West Side Story references. It goes staggeringly well.

Teacher's pet Amy is casually sleeping with the art teacher but whatever. Susan is getting an A+! He once again attacks Susan's art abilities as she storms out of his house.

Off-screen, the brats sang the Dreamgirls number winning over Lee's affection. Looks like they will be the girls' new guardians. But what's this! Carlos puts the garage door down to reveal "Gays R Stupid." Juanita is unable to provide an explanation to her gay bashing, but she does catch on to the family's apparent trouble. But once again, no reason for being a baby homophobe.

Penny never showed up to her plans with her father causing Lynette to feel guilty because it is important to show that they can feel this emotion at the end of every subplot on the show.

Oh no, its Chuck! And he has a picture of that guy from Ugly Betty (or the guy who the ladies helped to kill and bury). Chuck sees that Bree is lying about not knowing the man but luckily Ben comes to her rescue. And embraces her. Turns out Ben is going to take care of getting rid of the body but it might be for his own gain.

Lynette forces Penny to play catch with his dad after explaining that Jane didn't break up the family. As long as Penny thinks Lynette is prettier than Jane, everything will be fine. More Lynette tears!

Ben will enlist the help in Mike to hide the body, no questions asked.

Well it seems like this whole business can be put behind the three housewives, but then Susan joins the girl's celebration to be informed that they knew all about everything the entire time. Oh and then the blackmail letter is brought up, alienating Lynette from the bunch. Everything Lynette thought she could count on is going away. So she storms out right after Susan.

Susan finally unleashes her angst into art. Just as Mike buries the body under the construction site, her painting is revealed: a shocking depiction of the girls in the woods with the corpse, Susan standing alienated from the girls.

Never before has the main conflict directly dealt with all 4 of the women without an overarching antagonist (at least one yet to be revealed.) I love how their subplots directly tie in to their stake in it.

 

 

 

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