Cervix With A Smile 2005/08/02

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Summer theatre festivals in New York are becoming infamous for featuring provocatively-titled shows. With dozens of productions competing for audience dollars and media space in a short period of time, a catchy title with lots of sexual innuendo is often more valuable than good writing and stellar acting. But every so often you run into the unfortunate occasion where the title seems like the most creative and entertaining aspect of the production. I'm afraid Elisa DeCarlo's collection of monologues and songs, Cervix With A Smile, is one of those occasions.

Meant as a showcase for DeCarlo to play an assortment of wacky and satirical characters, Cervix With A Smile rarely sings an original note. Cliche' characters like a heavily lisping, over-the-hill Marlene Dietrich, a teenage girl freaking out to her friend describing her first sexual experience, a Suzy Homemaker TV host introducing her audience to bondage and domination and a back-to-nature feminist celebrating the joy of menstruation might possibly be funny if DeCarlo had any fresh material to go with them.

Her song lyrics (she also composed, sometimes collaborating with Ellen Mandel) seem like lackluster imitations of other writers' better efforts, such as the double entendre number "That Man Can Cook" and the 50's parody "I Had a Dream Date With Jesus." Her frequent use of sound-alike words instead of true rhymes severely undercut her attempts at humor.

As a actress, DeCarlo shows little versatility from character to character. Her singing voice, though not especially attractive, is loud and clear.

Oddly, there is one enjoyable performance to recommend in Cervix With A Smile. Tracy Stark, the on-stage keyboard player and music director, has a few scattered lines here and there and she delivers them with zest and humor. Her one solo song, about a once-a-year tryst with Santa Claus ("The stockings were hung from my garter with care...") has by far the best lyric from DeCarlo's pen and Stark's rendition is funny and sexy. Where's her show?

Photo by Richard Termine

After 20-odd years singing, dancing and acting in dinner theatres, summer stocks and the ever-popular audience participation murder mysteries (try improvising with audiences after they?ve had two hours of open bar), Michael Dale segued his theatrical ambitions into playwriting. The buildings which once housed the 5 Off-Off Broadway plays he penned have all been destroyed or turned into a Starbucks, but his name remains the answer to the trivia question, "Who wrote the official play of Babe Ruth's 100th Birthday?" He served as Artistic Director for The Play's The Thing Theatre Company, helping to bring free live theatre to underserved communities, and dabbled a bit in stage managing and in directing cabaret shows before answering the call (it was an email, actually) to become BroadwayWorld.com's first Chief Theatre Critic. While not attending shows Michael can be seen at Shea Stadium pleading for the Mets to stop imploding. Likes: Strong book musicals and ambitious new works. Dislikes: Unprepared celebrities making their stage acting debuts by starring on Broadway and weak bullpens.

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