Interview: Marilu Henner of CACTUS FLOWER at New Theater & Restaurant

Marilu Henner on Memory, Cactus Flower, and her Life 

Marilu Henner is currently starring as Stephanie Dickinson in Cactus Flower at The New Theatre & Restaurant in Overland Park, Kansas. Best known for her work on Taxi and for her Highly Superior Autobiographical Memory (HSAM) - Henner remains one of the most dynamic and wide-ranging performers working today.

We spoke over lunch during her Kansas City run, where the conversation ranged from the origins of Grease to her health philosophy, her family, and what it means to remember nearly everything.

Kansas City and Cactus Flower

Q: Hi Marilu and Welcome to Kansas City. I’m going to assume this is your first extended visit to Kansas City. What has surprised you most?
Marilu Henner: The audiences. They’re incredible — especially the matinees. We do two matinees a week, and they’re wild in the best way. People are so engaged, and that energy really feeds the show. You really feel like you’re in a conversation with them at every performance which is exactly what you want in theater.

And the New Theater facility itself!  Richard Carrothers and Dennis Hennessey have created something very special. As an actor, I can share how sensitive they are in their treatment of visiting working actors, how they treat their entire staff, and the respect they show for their audiences.

I have to say, Kansas City is just a great town. I haven’t had the chance to see as much of it as I’d like because we’re working so much, but I really hope I get to come back.

Q: What has the audience response been like to Cactus Flower?
Henner: It’s been great. I think we’re past the point where people would get offended by the material. Now they just laugh. The humor comes from the characters, and if you let it play honestly, it really works.

It’s such a well-constructed play. You don’t have to modernize it. If you let the timing and the relationships do the work, it lands. People recognize the absurdity of some of the attitudes, and that’s part of the fun.

It becomes layered humor—you’re laughing at the characters and, also, at the era.

Q: What has your experience been working with this cast?
Henner: I love them. I especially love playing opposite John Rensenhouse as Dr. Julian Winston — He’s one of my favorite co-stars I’ve ever had. We have great chemistry, and that makes everything easier and more fun on stage.

Early Career and Grease

Q: You’re a Chicago native. Tell me about early Marilu.
Henner: I grew up in a house that was full of activity. We had a dancing school in our garage with 200 students between the ages of 2 and 80, including the nuns from the Catholic school next door who came over for stretch classes. 

My Mother also ran a beauty shop in our kitchen. She had about 25 women from the neighborhood who came in for cuts, color and perms.  Our refrigerator was in the basement, and in its place was a blue hair-drying chair.

My uncle lived upstairs with ten cats, two dogs, two birds, a skunk, 150 fish and his boyfriend Charles. Uncle taught art at the Catholic grammar school next door and was the neighborhood astrologist and had a cat hospital on our roof.  Our house became the cultural center of the neighborhood. There was always music, dancing, and art. People were always coming and going. There was just constant activity.

Q: You were part of the original Chicago production of Grease. What do you remember about that?
Henner: Growing up in a dancing school, I got very involved with community theater in Chicago, and one of the guys I met doing a play when I was 15 called me two years later and said he’d written a show about the kids he went to high school with and would I be part of it.  At the first rehearsal there were two stacks of papers a foot high each. One was scenes – the Book Report scene, the Polio Shot scene, the Lunchroom scene, the Pajama Party scene, etc. And the other stack was songs – 37 songs in the first act alone!  We just cut, cut, cut and shaped it into something that worked so well that a New York producer, Ken Waissman, saw it and wanted it!

Q: You turned down going to New York with Grease. Why?
Henner: I didn’t think it would be a hit! There had been another Chicago show that went to New York the year before and didn’t work, and I thought Grease was too Chicago. Obviously… I was wrong. (laughs)

Hyperthymesia and Memory

Q: Many people know you have an exceptional memory. It is called Highly Superior Autobiographical Memory (HSAM).  Describe what it is like to remember almost everything from your life.
Henner: If you give me a date, I’ll tell you the day of the week and what I was doing on that day. I can access it. I remember conversations, events, context—what was going on around me. It’s just there.

Q: When did you first realize your memory was different?
Henner: When I was about six. People started noticing it. It’s always been my normal.

Q: Do you think memory shapes how you experience life overall?

Henner: Your memory is your story.  Everything you’ve been through is on your emotional hard drive and makes you behave the way you do. So, yes … your memory and the way you process your memories shapes every aspect of your life. 

Q: Has your memory changed over time?
Henner: If anything, it’s gotten sharper. People ask me about dates every day—at airports, on the street — so I’m constantly using it.

Family and Personal Life

Q: Tell me about your family.
Henner: I’m such a mom. That’s the first thing I am.

My boys are doing great—my oldest, Nick, is a Sundance award-winning director (Theater Camp).  And my younger son, Joey, is not only an international Bridge player, but he’s also won two Emmys for his work on the NBC Olympics.  I’m very proud of them.

Q: What brings you the most joy outside of performing?
Henner: My family, absolutely. And learning. I’m always working on something, always curious.

Q: I understand you’re in the middle of a big move.
Henner: Yes. I’ve had a big house in Los Angeles for years, but now I’m selling it to get two places—one in L.A. and one in New York. It just makes sense for how my husband and I live and work.

Health and Philosophy

Q: Health has been a major focus in your life and writing. Where did that begin?
Henner: After my parents both died in their 50s, I knew I couldn’t let their deaths be in vain, so I became obsessed with learning everything I could about health.  I went to doctors and nutritionists and read everything I could.  I even took Human Anatomy classes at UCLA.  I put together a protocol that worked for me, started writing books about my health journey, and I’ve never looked back.

 It became even more personal when my new boyfriend (now husband) was diagnosed with two primary cancers the first few months of our dating.

Q: What approach did you take?
Henner: He said right away, “I’m not losing my organs.” So we explored everything—nutrition, detox, immunotherapy, lifestyle changes. No chemo. No radiation. And today, he’s been in remission for over 20 years.

Q: That’s remarkable.
Henner: It changed everything for us. I realized I had to understand what works for my body and my life. That’s what my books are about.

Work, Writing, and What’s Next

Q: You’ve written ten books and are working on another. What drives that?
Henner: I’ve always loved writing. I kept diaries growing up, and I always knew I would write books. It’s just another way of expressing ideas and helping people.

Documentary Work and Future Projects

Q: You’re also working on a documentary. Can you tell me about it?
Henner: It’s about memory—the humanity of memory, not just mine. I’ve interviewed a lot of people—actors, doctors, friends—about what memory means in their lives.

It’s just another way to explore ideas and share what I’ve learned.

Q: What’s the biggest challenge with a project like that?
Henner: Capturing something that’s universal, not just specific to me.

Q: Will it be widely available?
Henner: That’s the plan. We’ll see how it’s distributed, but it’s a very exciting project.

Industry Perspective

Q: What do you enjoy most about being on stage at this point in your life?
Henner: Being present with an audience. There’s nothing like live theater. Every night is different.

Q: Is retirement even a consideration for you?
Henner: No. (laughs) Why would I stop? I don’t understand retirement.

Closing

Q: What’s next for you after this run?
Henner: Everything! Writing, performing, traveling. I like being busy. That’s how I live.

Marilu Henner in Cactus Flower continues at New Theatre through June 28th.  Tickets are available on the New Theatre website or by calling 913.649.7469 (SHOW)

Headline photo by Elizabeth Carney.

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