Student Blog: One Step Closer: My mantra around rejection

When humans get physically pushed, we instinctively step to avoid falling on the ground. We don’t pay attention to where we’re stepping or where we’re going; our feet simply take control to help us catch ourselves. With this in mind, I want to create a scenario for you. For those handling rejection and uncertainty, I hope this gives you some clarity on reframing rejection and what it truly means.

Scenario

Imagine you’re stranded in a large, dark field, standing blindfolded. No sense of direction, no way to see the end of the field. You may be standing and waiting for someone to rescue you, or you may be walking around aimlessly with no clue where you’re going but trying to do something. All of a sudden, something creeps up in front of you and shoves you backwards. Instinctively, you stumble backwards and use your feet to prevent yourself from falling. 

It keeps happening. Something keeps pushing you in a different direction, and you’re wondering why. But there’s a pattern you’re missing. You may be too busy thinking about the push itself to realize that (if you didn’t fall), you stepped in a new direction after the push. You didn’t think about where your feet would land; they just landed another step in the direction gravity carried you toward.

Now, since you’re blindfolded and can’t see anything, you don’t know where the end of this field is. So you don’t know how big the land is, and what the end of it even looks like. You just stand and wait for someone to rescue you, wondering why you keep randomly getting pushed another way.

After a while, you become more desperate and annoyed by the pushing and just want to get out. Then, all of a sudden, one last shove, and you suddenly feel water at your feet. Your blindfold has been taken off, and the field is gone. You’ve never seen this place, but it’s the most beautiful thing you could have imagined for what lies outside the field. As you’re finally taking in the Earth again, you have the realization that although the pushing was annoying and hurt at times, it led you somewhere. You almost want to thank it for what it put you through.

So, where am I going with all of this? 

After hearing this scenario, I want you to think about this metaphorically. Imagine a rejection from something you’re working toward is a “push.” It shoves you in a different direction than intended, and you have no sight of where it’s taking you.

Rejection feels like a push. It hurts. It’s okay to admit that. And you truly don’t know why you’re being pushed in this unplanned direction. All you can do is have faith that it’s pushing you in the direction that you’re meant to go. 
 

Takeaways

This is something that came to my head when I was thinking about a way to process the feeling of uncertainty in rejection. Especially after coming out of a long audition season (and my first one as an aspiring professional performer), I certainly have gotten my fair share of rejection letters this year. And there were many moments where it felt like no matter how many auditions I submitted or showed up for, no matter how many people I could reach, I wasn’t going anywhere. But after I did get an offer for an incredible opportunity over the summer, I realized that all of the rejection was the thing that led me here. The uncertainty was the reason I auditioned for the contract I ended up signing. There was no way I could have expected to be where I am today, even at the beginning of the year, but trusting the process and catching myself with every shove is the reason I made it out (for now)!

So keep going. One day, you’ll be out of the field, in whatever way that looks like for you. Trust the process, and know that every rejection and feeling of uncertainty, you’re just one step closer to where you’re meant to go.