Best Customer Complaint Letter - EVER.

[Weez]

Posted: 1/29/09 at 2:21pm

"Dear Mr Branson

REF: Mumbai to Heathrow 7th December 2008

I love the Virgin brand, I really do which is why I continue to use it despite a series of unfortunate incidents over the last few years. This latest incident takes the biscuit.

Ironically, by the end of the flight I would have gladly paid over a thousand rupees for a single biscuit following the culinary journey of hell I was subjected to at thehands of your corporation.

Look at this Richard. Just look at it:"

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/travelnews/4344890/Virgin-the-worlds-best-passenger-complaint-letter.html

Accompanied by seven photographs and with a certain directness of tone communicated by the absence of frequent commas, this is the funniest thing I've read for quite a long time. :3

[Shannon Bo Dannon]

Posted: 1/29/09 at 2:28pm

It’s your hamster Richard. It’s your hamster in the box and it’s not breathing.

LMAO that was my favorite part!

[Weez]

Posted: 1/29/09 at 2:32pm

Me too! I can just hear this guy's voice in my head, even though I've no idea what it must sound like, and I've read the letter several times over now, and no matter how much I try not to laugh, I always lose it at that point. XD

I think it loses momentum once he runs out of things to say about the food, but it's so awesome up until then that I totally forgive him. :3

[Calvin]

Posted: 1/29/09 at 2:34pm

If I were in a desert, I'd be happy to be served a tomato.

[verynewyorkcurious]

Posted: 1/29/09 at 2:36pm

My favorite part was the crime scene cookie(s)..and "Is that Ray Liotta?" Hahaha

[Schmerg_The_Impaler]

Posted: 1/29/09 at 2:58pm

Haha, I can't even quote a favourite part! It's all so delightfully snarky.

Okay, maybe this part:

Well you’ll be fascinated to hear that it wasn't custard. It was a sour gel with a clear oil on top. It’s only redeeming feature was that it managed to be so alien to my palette that it took away the taste of the curry emanating from our miscellaneous central cuboid of beige matter.

Also loved this bit: When I attempted to make the drink in a big bowl it formed a cheese Richard, a cheese. That cheese looked a lot like your baaji-mustard. I'm not quite sure why, though.

[EVIE]

Posted: 1/29/09 at 4:32pm

I am sitting in my cubicle laughing hysterically! My co-worker thought I was crying. The mustard part is brilliant!

[EponineAmneris]

Posted: 1/30/09 at 6:59am

This is brilliant. Very witty and well thought out and well meaning.

Being in customer service myself, I wish more complaints were approached this way.

[nmartin]

Posted: 1/30/09 at 7:22am

I just emailed that to two friends of mine. That is one of the funniest things I have ever read.
"through the digestive tract of a bird."

[jasonf]

Posted: 1/30/09 at 8:27am

What do we do we fly, why? What do we do, we fly!

[lusciouslace]

Posted: 1/30/09 at 11:47am

Oh.my.god....that took my breath away I was laughing so hard.