This week in Mystic Falls...oh, wait. We weren't in Mystic Falls, we weren't in New Orleans, and we weren't even in Bon Temps. Nope, this week's episode of SUPERNATURAL, 'Hibbing 911,' took us to Hibbing, Minnesota where the vampires weren't angst-ridden, sexually frustrated teens, but hippies who just couldn't leave Woodstock behind.
Quick question: Is your mom an ancient, evil witch? Great, we can continue now! Tonight's episode of SUPERNATURAL, entitled 'Girls, Girls, Girls,' hit us with the bombshell of motherly revelations. Not all people can have mothers who make them nachos and do their laundry.
Happy Thanksgiving, everyone! We may be a week away until the festive American holiday, but this week's episode of THE VAMPIRE DIARIES, entitled 'Fade Into You,' was all about Thanksgiving, or should I say Friendsgiving since none of the characters on the show that still have alive and breathing human family members could celebrate with them because of that pesky border situation. Or their family just didn't feel like taking the drive to Whitmore.
There is no better board game out there than Clue. In fact, I spent most of my childhood pestering people to play it with me. Whether it was Mrs. Peacock, in the study, with the rope, or Colonel Mustard, in the library, with the candlestick, the game never got old. This week, it was Dean Winchester, in the kitchen, with the revolver. You heard me; this week's SUPERNATURAL, entitled 'Ask Jeeves,' traveled to the world of the WASP's to solve an old-fashion, monstrous murder-mystery.
On my very first birthday a family friend handed me a gift. I didn't know what it was because I was only one year old and anything that was handed to me was instantly food. Unfortunately, it wasn't food. Fortunately, once unwrapped, the gift yielded my most prized possession: my magical bear. His name is Sammy and he's gone everywhere with me: across seas, college, my first apartment, etc. One time he got lost in a Sizzler (it was probably 1994 too). That was a terrible day. The magic bestowed upon Sammy is irreplaceable. When he's gone so is my ability to turn water into rum, to make 400 candles light up at once, and my most magical ability of all, sleeping through the night.
This week's 200th episode of SUPERNATURAL may go down in fandom history as one of the greatest episodes ever aired throughout its ten-season run. 'Fan Fiction' sought to bring some of the shows greatest aspects to the forefront, falling in line with similar episodes like 'Changing Channels' and 'The French Mistake.' These episodes showed us just how painfully aware of themselves the shows creators, writers, actors, etc. are and Tuesday's episode was no exception.
Listen, I won't even begin to understand the first thing about magic. Ever since a witch put a spell on me to obsess over vampire shows and write sarcastic reviews, I've made sure to just nod my head and smile. We are talking about some dark, twisted magic here. And that's exactly what I've learned when watching THE VAMPIRE DIARIES; nod my head, smile, and enjoy the ride. Also, there's a dark, shadowy figure standing behind me playing Nickelback on a loop. I've said too much.
Hey guys, let's talk about college Homecoming. In case you didn't know, American college Homecoming mostly consists of underage co-eds drinking a ton of booze while bowing down to a mascot in the form of a lion, tiger, liger, or velociraptor. My Homecoming was spent drinking boxed wine by a dumpster.
After I endure a stressful event in my life, like becoming a demon that likes to murder a ton, I usually kick back, drink some margaritas, and watch CLUELESS on repeat. It's annoying when people try to push me to do stressful activities like hunt monsters or solve the supernatural crises of the world because, and I quote, 'As if.'
I'm constantly trying to reinvent myself in different ways. Whether it's my hair color, style, clothing, last name, first name...oops, I've said too much. Just know that one time I tried to reinvent myself as a witch named Gertrude and things didn't work out so well for a guy that now has purple hair, one eyebrow, and a lizard for a left hand. I quickly reinvented myself as a 20-something New Yorker that watches and writes about shows on some network called The CW.
I read a book on demon exorcisms once. It was 2,304 pages long and written all in Latin, but I got the gist of it, naturally. The way to exercise a demon is simple: subject your possessed loved on to blessed flaming hot Cheetos and 100 consecutive hours of DAWSON'S CREEK and voila, demon gone.
As THE VAMPIRE DIARIES continues to straddle two dimensions and two time periods, I've done a lot of thinking on which of these planes I would rather exist on. Fortunately, I didn't have to waste too much time because the answer is obviously 1994 Heaven/Hell. Awesome music, sweet clothing, no lines, no worrying about obnoxious people trying to murder you every five minutes. Damon and Bonnie have it good.
Breaking up is hard to do and letting go of the person you love can be a tough decision, especially if that loved one is going on murder sprees without your consent. This week's episode of SUPERNATURAL, entitled “Reichenbach,” was an all out display of just how much Crowley loved Deanmon and how even the King of Hell's heart can be broken.
If you asked me to relive the same day in the 1990s over and over again, I wouldn't protest. I'd pull on my comfiest, oversized flannel, turn on some SALUTE YOUR SHORTS, and listen to the Spice Girls on repeat. To me, reliving the 90s seems like a nostalgic dream come true.
Ten seasons is a heck of a long run for a show. Most shows fizzle out around Season Five, grasping desperately to come up with new and original material. Season Nine of SUPERNATURAL felt like a jumbled mess at the end, I was truly unsure of where they were heading and if they could continue to grab my attention. Luckily, Monday's premiere was a step above previous years, introducing us to Deanmon and the shenanigans that are sure to follow on this new journey.
I don't know about you guys, but it's been a long summer for me. Constantly running away from werewolves, fighting off hungry vampires, and shooing away annoying Travelers that keep chanting nonsense in my ear every time I turn a corner. Luckily, our favorite gang of Mystic Falls residents and former residents are back for an all-new season and I can take a breather. Just kidding, a witch just turned me into a vampire-werewolf-mermaid- hybrid.
Not many shows can brag about garnering a tenth season, but as 'SUPERNATURAL' heads into the big 1-0, they're stronger than ever. Last season brought heartbreak, crazy mythology, and a season ending twist to keep viewers glued to The CW's wildly popular genre show.
On October 2, “THE VAMPIRE DIARIES” will delve into its sixth season. While the end of season five left viewers on the edge of their seat, culminating in one of the shows most outrageous cliffhangers to date, season six will finally give us the answers to the troubling questions we've been dwelling on all summer.
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