PANTO SEASON: BEHIND THE SCENES - Thursday Business

How many attempts does it take for two henchmen to tie up a pretty girl? The answer, it would seem, is at least three, sometimes four. In an ideal world, the answer would be one, but tonight the henchmen are struggling to get things in the right order and the girl keeps escaping.

Similarly, how often should the pretty girl and her nanny throw the henchmen across the room before they can do it without the henchmen crashing into each other? It seems to be more often than you think.

Don't worry, though. We're not witnessing an attempted kidnapping here, but the penultimate Thursday rehearsal of Cubbington Players' pantomime preparations. Specifically, the efforts of the Sheriff of Nottingham's henchmen, Sir Lunchalot and Sir Cumference, to capture Maid Marian. Despite the confusion, it is actually going well.

Cubbington Village Hall being unavailable, we are instead in the boardroom of renowned international research conglomerate Millward Brown. This is causing some concern to Players' chairman Hazel Blenkinsop, who has been threatened with dire things should the ingredients of a cake mixing scene (the one shown in the photographs here) end up all over the clean carpet.

At times it is chaotic, with more than one sequence being rehearsed at any time. From the cake baking scene come voices of concern that an egg may not have been cooked long enough. On the other side of the room, the rope trick falls apart again. At one point, disaster is narrowly avoided as John Staton is hurled too vigorously and crash-lands against (rather than on) a table.

With barely a fortnight to go until opening night, the show is clearly coming together. Some things still happen in the wrong order, and of course there is the regular concern over lines - the latter resulting in the following exchange:

John Staton: Shall we finish the scene?

Barry West: There's more?

Producer: If you know your lines.

Barry West: I didn't know I had any.

There are other moments of unintentional comedy, too. The look of panic on Cathy MacKenzie's face when she thinks that she will have to sing a solo of 'Happy Birthday' to the audience during one of the intervals, or Fay Staton corpsing to the point of hyperventilation every time someone mentions the word 'nuts'. But in the end, producer Tony pronounces himself satisfied: "There's been some good things done this evening, lots of stuff sorted out."

And no carpets were harmed in the process, either.

Cubbington Players present Robin Hood on 29th and 30th January and 5th and 6th February at Cubbington Village Hall, Broadway, Cubbington, Leamington Spa, Warwickshire. Ticket details at www.cubbingtonplayers.com