Sit down, shut up and clap: A guide to theater etiquette by Amanda Duarte

[DAME]

TRUTH!   Yes!!!!

 

https://www.timeout.com/newyork/theater/a-guide-to-theater-etiquette

[g.d.e.l.g.i.]

Possible truth, yes. True for everyone... eh... maybe not. (Read before judging; he's got a valid point.)

[DAME]

g.d.e.l.g.i. said: "Possible truth, yes. True for everyone... eh... maybe not. (Read before judging; he's got a valid point.)"

 

I read it.  He has a point.  But I don't want to be the one to have to deal with all that.  There are exceptions.  But for the most part It is truth and true for most. 

 

[Bette's Turban]

DAME said: "TRUTH! Yes!!!!



https://www.timeout.com/newyork/theater/a-guide-to-theater-etiquette"

I love it DAME!  It is as if she is in my head.  Especially with  "I have told a woman in a wheelchair to stop talking. I have told a seven-foot-tall man that if he didn’t stop ****ing with a plastic bag I would suffocate him with it. I have threatened to shove peanut M&Ms up the ass of a senior citizen who would not stop loudly chomping on them and twisting their wrapper open and shut."

[g.d.e.l.g.i.]

DAME said: "I read it. He has a point. But I don't want to be the one to have to deal with all that."

Luckily, you don't. It's management's problem.

[LizzieCurry]

I sat next to a guy with mild Tourette's or a similar tic disorder at a show once, and it was fine. (Granted, this was Book of Mormon, so the laughter masked potential distraction, and we were pretty close, and there aren't a ton of very quiet scenes in that show anyway.) For the most part, this purposely OTT piece isn't for him or anyone who can't help themselves. It's for people who should know better or do know better and choose not to behave accordingly.

[Bette's Turban]

LizzieCurry said: "I sat next to a guy with mild Tourette's or a similar tic disorder at a show once, and it was fine. (Granted, this was Book of Mormon, so the laughter masked potential distraction, and we were pretty close, and there aren't a ton of very quiet scenes in that show anyway.) For the most part, this purposely OTT piece isn't for him or anyone who can't help themselves. It's for people who should know better or do know better and choose not to behave accordingly."

 

 

Exactly.   Very funny piece DAME.  Made me feel I am not alone.  I will tell someone to STFU or rip the candy out of their hands before sitting thru a few hours in misery.

[mailhandler777]

I chew gum during a show. I don't chew like a cow or chomp so no clue how anyone would be mad at that. It's usually to keep me from yawning which happens especially if it's been a long day.

[DAME]

mailhandler777 said: "I chew gum during a show. I don't chew like a cow or chomp so no clue how anyone would be mad at that. It's usually to keep me from yawning which happens especially if it's been a long day."

I would rip the gum right out of your mouth.  And while I was there I would grab your tongue, wrap it around your neck and choke you with it.  No one cares about your long day.  Stay home you selfish jerk.  Really.  

[Impossible2]

Amanda is my spirit animal x

[mailhandler777]

DAME said: "mailhandler777 said: "I chew gum during a show. I don't chew like a cow or chomp so no clue how anyone would be mad at that. It's usually to keep me from yawning which happens especially if it's been a long day."

I would rip the gum right out of your mouth. And while I was there I would grab your tongue, wrap it around your neck and choke you with it. No one cares about your long day. Stay home you selfish jerk. Really. "

Reported. 

[DAME]

mailhandler777 said: "DAME said: "mailhandler777 said: "I chew gum during a show. I don't chew like a cow or chomp so no clue how anyone would be mad at that. It's usually to keep me from yawning which happens especially if it's been a long day."

I would rip the gum right out of your mouth. And while I was there I would grab your tongue, wrap it around your neck and choke you with it. No one cares about your long day. Stay home you selfish jerk. Really. "

Reported."

Oh girl .  PUHLEEEZE!   REPORT ME!

[mailhandler777]

DAME said: "mailhandler777 said: "DAME said: "mailhandler777 said: "I chew gum during a show. I don't chew like a cow or chomp so no clue how anyone would be mad at that. It's usually to keep me from yawning which happens especially if it's been a long day."

I would rip the gum right out of your mouth. And while I was there I would grab your tongue, wrap it around your neck and choke you with it. No one cares about your long day. Stay home you selfish jerk. Really. "

Reported."

Oh girl . PUHLEEEZE! REPORT ME!"

Who peed in your Wheaties? 

[Moderator]

Ok folks, let's settle down and pull back the rhetoric here. It seems like some of these comments were hyperbolic and made in jest, but let's just keep in mind that things like that don't always translate online. So, please refrain from these types of things in the future, otherwise, we will likely have to err on the side of them being a personal attack. If we think a real threat of violence is made, that would of course result in a board suspension, which we obviously don't want to do. Thanks for understanding.

[SmokeyLady]

mailhandler777 said: "I chew gum during a show. I don't chew like a cow or chomp so no clue how anyone would be mad at that. It's usually to keep me from yawning which happens especially if it's been a long day."

 

That makes noise.   If you ever sat around me the evening would not go well for you.  Very rude. 

 

[mailhandler777]

SmokeyLady said: "mailhandler777 said: "I chew gum during a show. I don't chew like a cow or chomp so no clue how anyone would be mad at that. It's usually to keep me from yawning which happens especially if it's been a long day."



That makes noise. If you ever sat around me the evening would not go well for you. Very rude.

"

I make no noise chewing gum. I make more noise yawning. People that chew mints which are hard make noise. 

[Gizmo6]

Moderator said: "Ok folks, let's settle down and pull back the rhetoric here. It seems like some of these comments were hyperbolic and made in jest, but let's just keep in mind that things like that don't always translate online. So, please refrain from these types of things in the future, otherwise, we will likely have to err on the side of them being a personal attack. If we think a real threat of violence is made, that would of course result in a board suspension, which we obviously don't want to do. Thanks for understanding."

I know Americans struggle with the English language but Gurl please! 

Would! 

I always ask selfish audience members beside me, awww pet is it your first time at the theatre? 

I poke people in front! Me and an old lady at Cat on a hot tin roof kept poking the people in front as they kept leaning forward and talking 

if they aren’t beside me I stand look them dead in the eye, point at them and then point at the exit 

[DAME]

Moderator said: "Ok folks, let's settle down and pull back the rhetoric here. It seems like some of these comments were hyperbolic and made in jest, but let's just keep in mind that things like that don't always translate online. So, please refrain from these types of things in the future, otherwise, we will likely have to err on the side of them being a personal attack. If we think a real threat of violence is made, that would of course result in a board suspension, which we obviously don't want to do. Thanks for understanding."

 

Got it  

 

[Bette's Turban]

mailhandler777 said: "SmokeyLady said: "mailhandler777 said: "I chew gum during a show. I don't chew like a cow or chomp so no clue how anyone would be mad at that. It's usually to keep me from yawning which happens especially if it's been a long day."



That makes noise. If you ever sat around me the evening would not go well for you. Very rude.

"

I make no noise chewing gum. I make more noise yawning. People that chewmints which are hard make noise."

If someone is going to sit around me and make noise; there is going to be consequences.  My actions would probably bring consequences to me as well.  This is not a personal attack on anyone.  But if I spend good money to go to the theater and if  your selfishness is gong to ruin the evening for me then I might be willing to pay the price to make sure it ruins the evening for you as well. That is something to think about next time you put that piece gum in your mouth, or crush that bottle of water, or rattle those M&M's,  or talk, or leave your cell on.  People around you are strangers.  Best to treat everyone with respect so we can all have a good time at the theater.

[vanbrig]

So here’s the thing…I’ve sat next to people chewing gum before who have been extremely loud. But more often than that, I’ve sat next to people chewing gum and never would have known it, had they not unwrapped it and popped it into their mouth before the show or at intermission. They chewed it quietly, so I didn't hear anything. Maybe if I had sat there and forced myself to focus on them I might have heard something, but obviously I was more concerned with watching the show at the time.  

I get that people can be very rude, but I’m not going to fault someone who has to take a drink of water or quietly tap their leg a bit as long as they are courteous (i.e., don’t crinkle the water bottle or swish the ice around or make a big deal out of moving). My mom has restless leg syndrome, so I understand that some people who enjoy theatre just can’t comfortably sit perfectly still for an hour at a time.   

When I see a show, my eyes are focused on the stage and my ears are tuned in to the action happening on the stage. So unless someone is doing something very distracting, like making noise, looking at some sort of screen, flailing about, etc., I’m not going to notice.  Maybe it makes me a bad theatre fan or whatever, but I’m not going to spend my time at a show playing audience police unless it’s something egregious.   

[Bette's Turban]

vanbrig said: "So here’s the thing…I’ve sat next to people chewing gum before who have been extremely loud. But more often than that, I’ve sat next to people chewing gum and never would have known it, had they not unwrapped it and popped it into their mouth before the show or at intermission. They chewed it quietly, so I didn't hear anything. Maybe if I had sat there and forced myself to focus on them I might have heard something, but obviously I was more concerned with watching the show at the time.

I get that people can be very rude, but I’m not going to fault someone who has to take a drink of water or quietly tap their leg a bit as long as they are courteous (i.e., don’t crinkle the water bottle or swish the ice around or make a big deal out of moving). My mom has restless leg syndrome, so I understand that some people who enjoy theatre just can’t comfortably sit perfectly still for an hour at a time.

When I see a show, my eyes are focused on the stage and my ears are tuned in to the action happening on the stage. So unless someone is doing something very distracting, like making noise, looking at some sort of screen, flailing about, etc., I’m not going to notice. Maybe it makes me a bad theatre fan or whatever, but I’m not going to spend my time at a show playing audience police unless it’s something egregious."

I agree with you.  Why ruin it for myself being "audience police".  I certainly don't want my evening to be about that.   I even stopped going for a while because I thought it just wasn't worth it.  And there is a difference between someone that isn't doing it on purpose or someone that is blatant and just doesn't care.  If someone is making noise and they are within my reach I ask them politely to stop.  99 % of the times they do. If they don't.. then it escalates.  It has only happened twice for me.   And while it has ruined the evenings for me.  I guarantee you that the person on the receiving end will never behave that way in a theater again.  

[BroadwayConcierge]

I agree with some of the sentiments, but could she be more bitter and angry?

[DAME]

BroadwayConcierge said: "I agree with some of the sentiments, but could she be more bitter and angry?"

 

It is humor.  But if it is intended as bitterness I am all with it. 

[vanbrig]

Bette's Turban said: "I agree with you. Why ruin it for myself being "audience police". I certainly don't want my evening to be about that. I even stopped going for a while because I thought it just wasn't worth it. And there is a difference between someone that isn't doing it on purpose or someone that is blatant and just doesn't care. If someone is making noise and they are within my reach I ask them politely to stop. 99 % of the times they do. If they don't.. then it escalates. It has only happened twice for me. And while it has ruined the evenings for me. I guarantee you that the person on the receiving end will never behave that way in a theater again."

Oh definitely, there are plenty of people who are just being assholes, like the two grown women sitting next to me at Spongebob who seemed far more entertained playing with their Sour Patch Kids than they were with anything happening on stage. Those types of people deserve all the audience policing (within reason) they can get and I'll totally confront them, but I'm less concerned with someone who, yknow, needs to take a quick sip of water or something like that. 

[Broadway Joe]

I know she is joking but if you actually ever talk to people the way she does in real life then you best be prepared to fight because there is always someone out there more crazy than you.

I couldn't disagree more with the having to clap aspect. I paid my money for a ticket and if I don't like it I'm not clapping nor standing up to give them any praise. There's been a few shows that I've been to that deserved to be booed.

I also chew gum but never loudly.