Mom & Autistic child kicked out of Chicago Aladdin- Page 2

[Lot666]

Posted: 5/12/17 at 12:36pm

LYLS3637 said: "My parents made sure to always buy tickets on the aisle either in the back or immediately near an exit door, so at the first sign of trouble, I was out of there."

That's responsible parenting.

[Anthony Fremont]

Posted: 5/12/17 at 1:48pm

Does anyone else find it odd that her first response was to hit up a news network?

[mariel9]

Posted: 5/12/17 at 3:19pm

This quote of hers: "It's not in any regulation that a child with autism cannot come into the theater. I think it's discrimination."

is pretty dishonest since her son was kicked out for being disruptive, not for having autism. The autism may have caused the disruption, but it's reasonable for a theater to remove a disruptive patron and not discrimination.

[Margo319]

Posted: 5/12/17 at 4:18pm

That was not right, and the theater and cast should be ashamed of themselves.   They deal with people who stuff their faces with bags of candy and chips, people talking, and people on their goddamned phones every night.  But, a kid was kicked out for just being himself?  How horrendous.  Kick the people out who deserve it, who are consciously on their phones, crunching loudly, and generally being disgusting.  

Updated On: 5/12/17 at 04:18 PM

[KJisgroovy]

Posted: 5/12/17 at 4:29pm

This thread went on for two pages before someone became hysterical. Good job, you guys. We can all go home now. 

[Jane2]

Posted: 5/12/17 at 4:45pm

When I was still working in the theater, we had two rows in the back which were a slight distance from the rest of the orchestra. If a child was causing a disturbance, we resat them there and all was well.

btw, Brody Fosse, first you said  with all due respect to this mother, and then you called her an idiot. Some kind of respect~

[Margo319]

Posted: 5/12/17 at 5:03pm

If you're referring to me being "hysterical", you couldn't be more wrong. I am offering my opinion, since this is a message board.  

Re-seating them seems much more respectful.  

[KJisgroovy]

Posted: 5/12/17 at 5:19pm

I understand you're offering an opinion. 

I was offering my opinion on your opinion. Since this is a message board. 

Updated On: 5/12/17 at 05:19 PM

[Islander_fan]

Posted: 5/12/17 at 5:48pm

As a strong advocate for autism awareness let me see if I got this right. We are living in a society where acceptance of groups of people, that had been disenfranchised for years, are now being accepted with open arms. There has been recent talk of how can we make casting on Broadway far more ethnically diverse than it currently is. We just had a black president in office. And, yet, the hypocrisy surrounding those with autism or other or other disabilities that could be disturbing to those seeing a show is appalling. 

Saying that children with autism should only see shows that are offering autism friendly performances is, to me, treating them like second class citizens. It feels to me, like it's coming across as people saying that they are all in favor of acceptance when it works on their schedule. I am putting aside how much someone paid for a ticket (because as far as I am concerned, it doesn't matter. I am talking about human behavior not finances.) I am sorry for ranting, but some of the things I have read really pissed me off. And, to those who would respond and talk about consideration of others or how much money was spent on a ticket. I will say this. Get off your high horse, start preaching acceptance in all forms and at all times, not when it suites you the best. All I can say is congrats to the mother for taking her child to the theatre. I hope her kid is moved by the arts and the beauty of live performance as often as possible.  

[trpguyy]

Posted: 5/12/17 at 6:11pm

Anthony Fremont said: "Does anyone else find it odd that her first response was to hit up a news network?"

And apparently before even speaking to someone with "manager" in their title. 

[Margo319]

Posted: 5/12/17 at 6:15pm

If you deem my response "hysterical" you haven't really talked with lot of people.  Probably ever.  In your life time.  Thanks though, good for quite the laugh.  

[Dane F]

Posted: 5/12/17 at 6:20pm

Margo319 said: "If you deem my response "hysterical" you haven't really talked with lot of people.  Probably ever.  In your life time.  Thanks though, good for quite the laugh.  

 

"

Ok, maybe not hysterical, but you were waaaaaaaay to over the top for a discussion such as this.

 

Updated On: 5/12/17 at 06:20 PM

[JustAFan3]

Posted: 5/12/17 at 6:39pm

I think it boils down to responsible parenting, whether your child is special needs or not.  If my child is acting up, whether at a show, a restaurant or at church, I have always been cognizant and respectful of those around me and left. I was in Disney World and my kid was terrified at one of the shows and I took him out (and it doesn't get more kid friendly than Disney World).   I understand Aladdin is deemed a children's show, but people have paid their  hard earned money to attend.  It may have been too much stimulation  for the child.  I feel for the mom, she and her son have a tough road ahead of them with challenges that many do not have to contend with.  Without being there, no one can really weigh in on the level of disruption to the cast/audience.  I would like to think it was significant enough to be asked to leave.  I think it is great that shows do have performances for autistic people.  I attended a show at Paper Mill and there was a specific performance (I forget what show) that stated specifically it was for those with autism.  

[KJisgroovy]

Posted: 5/12/17 at 7:04pm

I don't think anyone has suggested people with autism shouldn't attend normal performances. As I'm sure you're aware, there's a broad spectrum of folks with autism and most of them could attend performance without anyone even knowing they were differently abled. The only suggestion I've read on this thread, and elsewhere, is that if someone if not able to attend a performance without disturbing a good number of other members of the audience... a different avenue of inclusion should be sought. I think asking people to treat the differently abled as if they weren't differently abled isn't acceptance, it's erasure. And please tell me what happens when folks who have serious cognitive issues that make it difficult for them to focus without distraction? Their disability is just... not as important? What about the hearing impaired? A theatrical audience is a community... and the the experience of one person shouldn't be prioritized over the rest of the entire community. Even if it's a little not nice.

Additionally, "I am talking about human behavior not finances." Is a fairly privileged thing to say. To think that most of human behavior is not, in fact, driven be finances is fairly naive. It seems like you've chosen your cause and that cause trumps all others. 

And let me be clear. Sometimes I'm a great big fat person. I see about 150 shows a year and on about 2 occasions, I was clearly making the person next to me uncomfortable. So I asked if there was a place I could sit, perhaps near the back, to make everyone more comfortable. I'm not looking for applause... but to pretend that I might not be causing discomfort to those around is not size-est, it's common courtesy.  

[Islander_fan]

Posted: 5/12/17 at 7:57pm

KJisgroovy

 

The reason why I said I was putting finances aside was not at all a fairly privileged thing to say. My post was talking about society in general. And, how I feel people view things. Yes, I am well aware that when it comes to this issue in the theatre, money does motivate things. I had a hunch,when writing my post, that someone would mention how much they paid. The angle that I was trying to go for was that on a broader context, regardless of theatre or not. People  tend to be open minded and accepting when it suits them at the time. The reason why I said the issue of money didn't matter to me was because while you're right, it does come down to money and how people view things. Such as I paid X dollars and should have a particular experience at the theatre.  That was something that I felt someone would say. Money does, though shouldn't  dictate how people behave.  

 

And, anyone on the spectrum should be able to see any damn show that they want regardless of whatever type of performance it is. Why is it that parents with autistic children should be cautious when they go in hopes of  not interfering with the enjoyment of people around then and not the other way around?

 

 

 

 

 

 

[GavestonPS]

Posted: 5/12/17 at 8:13pm

LYLS3637 said: "My parents starting taking me to theater/concert events at the age of 2. Even though most of the time I was behaved, engaged, and non-disruptive, as a younger child, there were times when I wasn't having it....

"

My grandparents did the same with me. According to family lore, I threw one tantrum when I was 2 and was out of the public space and back in the car so fast my head was spinning.

I know this story because I was so well-behaved throughout the rest of my childhood that strangers used to comment on my manners. For some reason, my grandparents and parents always felt a need to tell the above story. LOL.

But I didn't have a disability that prevented me from learning the lesson after one infraction.

[trpguyy]

Posted: 5/12/17 at 8:17pm

"Why is it that parents with autistic children should be cautious when they go in hopes of  not interfering with the enjoyment of people around then and not the other way around?"

 

Is it wrong to wish that everybody would be considerate of others?

[KJisgroovy]

Posted: 5/12/17 at 8:28pm

Yea. It's not mutually exclusive. It can be both. I'd never demand a disruptive child with autism leave but stay silent to disruptive, able bodied patrons behind me. To be fair, I would most likely just have my experience ruined and stay silent in both cases. But. It's both. Everyone should be cautious and reasonable about interfering with the enjoyment of the people around them. 

[GavestonPS]

Posted: 5/12/17 at 8:28pm

Islander_fan said: "
And, anyone on the spectrum should be able to see any damn show that they want regardless of whatever type of performance it is. Why is it that parents with autistic children should be cautious when they go in hopes of not interfering with the enjoyment of people around then and not the other way around?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"

What is "the other way around"? You want me to make sure I don't disturb somebody's autistic kid? If that means behaving myself, you got it. But if it means some sort of special behavior to avoid upsetting him, then you'd better send me a pamphlet.

The issue is disruption, not arbitrary labels. Allowing African-Americans to come down from the balcony is NOT the same issue as allowing a severely disturbed child stand and scream through an otherwise quiet drama.

Without exception, posters here have welcomed solutions that allow even the most severely autistic to attend the theater at some time. But destroying the experience for everyone else in the building is not a solution.

[Islander_fan]

Posted: 5/12/17 at 10:02pm

The point I am trying to make is that yes, everyone should be considerate of others. But, saying that a parent should not take their kid to a regular performance of a show because they may make sounds and disrupt those around them is silly. And yes,  family friends shows do have autism friendly performances. I was at one for Wicked a couple of years ago. Sure, there were some noises coming from the kids. However, to the actors credit they didn't miss a beat.

 

However, I strongly feel that kids with autism shouldn't be relegated to only going to autism friendly performances. Furthermore, times have changed and of course now having African Americans come down from the balcony isn't something that would be viewed as disruptive in today's world. But, it would back in the day. Obviously in that respect times have changed. To me, there's always gonna be something that people would find disturbing in the theatre. Be it children with disabilities in today's world, or beck in the days of segregation with black people coming down from the  balcony. I am not saying a pamphlet of any kind is needed. What I am saying is that one should look at this in a positive light. That light being that someone is having the ability to take in the amazing art form that is live theatre.

 

While back I was reading an interview with Mandy Patinkin. He told a story about how there was a performance of Evita where he heard a loud weezing sound coming from then audience. He thought about mentioning to someone so that they could mention it to the ushers. However, he was glad that he didn't. He found out later that the man was on oxygen and the sound he heard was the oxygen pump. He said that he was glad that this person was able to enjoy live theatre and he'd have felt bad if he did infect sau something. Same idea applies here.

 

[GavestonPS]

Posted: 5/12/17 at 10:33pm

Islander_fan said: "The point I am trying to make is that yes, everyone should be considerate of others. But, saying that a parent should not take their kid to a regular performance of a show because they may make sounds and disrupt those around them is silly. And yes,  family friends shows do have autism friendly performances. I was at one for Wicked a couple of years ago. Sure, there were some noises coming from the kids. However, to the actors credit they didn't miss a beat.

 

However, I strongly feel that kids with autism shouldn't be relegated to only going to autism friendly performances. Furthermore, times have changed and of course now having African Americans come down from the balcony isn't something that would be viewed as disruptive in today's world. But, it would back in the day. Obviously in that respect times have changed. To me, there's always gonna be something that people would find disturbing in the theatre. Be it children with disabilities in today's world, or beck in the days of segregation with black people coming down from the  balcony. I am not saying a pamphlet of any kind is needed. What I am saying is that one should look at this in a positive light. That light being that someone is having the ability to take in the amazing art form that is live theatre.

 

While back I was reading an interview with Mandy Patinkin. He told a story about how there was a performance of Evita where he heard a loud weezing sound coming from then audience. He thought about mentioning to someone so that they could mention it to the ushers. However, he was glad that he didn't. He found out later that the man was on oxygen and the sound he heard was the oxygen pump. He said that he was glad that this person was able to enjoy live theatre and he'd have felt bad if he did infect sau something. Same idea applies here.

 

 

"

^^^^ If only Mr. Patinkin were as kind to everyone else! (Allegedly.)

You're still trying to draw an exact parallel between race and disability and they are not always the same in terms of equality. Allowing African-Americans to sit in the orchestra disrupted nobody except racists and only because the latter chose to be bothered. Anybody (autistic or not) who is screaming or making loud and random noises during a show is inherently disruptive and not because of the bias of the majority. It's the disruption that qualifies the screamer for expulsion, not the category of person into which the screamer might be placed.

In my first post in this thread, I applauded the mother in question for at least trying to see if her child could sit quietly through a full-length show. (Others, who are specialists in this area say the mother should have known her child better; but I don't claim to be qualified to debate the matter.)

Nobody is saying autistics should be banned everywhere, just that those responsible for them shouldn't let the more severe cases destroy the experience of everyone in attendance. 

[VintageSnarker]

Posted: 5/13/17 at 12:12am

If the child was being disruptive enough for them to be asked to leave it sounds like he was either bored or upset by the performance. Maybe he was distracted or it was too much sensory stimulation. I'm not familiar with his level of autism to be able to say but regardless, it doesn't seem like he was engaged in the show in that moment. All these posts about the joys of live theater are great and all but if he wasn't enjoying himself, why get upset on his behalf that he got an early exit? 

In general, I agree with everyone else who has said that there's no reason a differently abled patron should have to see a different performance provided they conduct themselves in the same manner as the rest of the audience. It is a communal space. And yes, ignoring the financial aspect is privileged. 

[GavestonPS]

Posted: 5/13/17 at 12:27am

I got lost at the intersection of "differently abled" and "financially privileged". I'm not denying the existence of either, I just don't see what one has to do with the other in this conversation.

Maybe I missed something, but I don't think anybody meant to exile the differently abled to special performances UNLESS the spectator in question is unable to observe the usual conventions of theatergoing and will be better off at a special show where s/he can behave however s/he likes. I'm sure we would also agree to special performances for coughers, candy unwrappers, and cell-phone users.

[10086Sundays]

Posted: 5/13/17 at 12:31am

Someone who I spent 5 hours in the Hamilton cancellation line with ended up next to someone with mental and/or medical disabilities and their companion.  Throughout the show, the disabled(is that word still ok?) person was coughing uncontrollably and their companion would, in this person's words, "shove a cloth into" their mouth to stifle it.  They weren't asked to leave, however, it ruined the show for this person.  Not just because of the money and time they invested, but because it was distressing to witness what was happening, especially since the person didn't seem aware of the show they were being made to sit through.

If the same were to happen at a restaurant, would it be ok for a disabled child to throw food at people without repercussions in order to give the child the experience of dining out?  This isn't like an airplane where crying kids, etc are part of the deal.  

 

GavestonPS said: "I'm sure we would also agree to special performances for coughers, candy unwrappers, and cell-phone users."

If only we could, or if that upsets people, "quiet" shows, like the quiet cars on trains.

Updated On: 5/13/17 at 12:31 AM

[Jed2]

Posted: 5/13/17 at 1:34am

Ok, I may be showing my age here, but do many theatres still have crying rooms? They are sound proof rooms at the back of the theatre with a glass window and stage-over speaker to view the show. I think they are a great idea in theatres, especially with family shows like Aladdin. If this little guy was getting upset or restless, he can sit with his mother in the room for a little bit and still be able to watch the show whilst not disturbing others. Although I do admit that if a baby was also crying in there, the sensory overload may have been too much. 

Updated On: 5/13/17 at 01:34 AM