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8/2 @ 10:14 PM
TheDailyShow - #TDSBreakingNews Ebola vaccine is 100% effective. So everyone can go back to making out with African bats.

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8/2 @ 8:35 PM
TheDailyShow - Tonight on @comedycentral! Join us as we host a one hour special dedicated to your favorite moments… https://t.co/v0uQEj5MKB

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8/1 @ 1:53 PM
TheDailyShow - #TDSBreakingNews Windows 10 is spying on almost everything users do...You're told by your insufferable Mac-using friend.

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7/31 @ 2:00 PM
TheDailyShow - Jon gets a lesson in corporate advertising from @WWERollins. http://t.co/baU98heYyT http://t.co/xLL4gqsINb

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7/31 @ 9:57 AM
TheDailyShow - #TDSBreakingNews India will become world's most populous nation by 2022. Would celebrate with musical number if there were any room left.

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7/30 @ 11:30 PM
TheDailyShow - Tonight, Jon doesn't sell out, he buys in. #newtagteam #SethRollins #WWE https://t.co/ZVxT0zPaK4

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7/30 @ 10:58 PM
TheDailyShow - Tonight! Unpopular GOP candidates struggle for right to be shouted at by Donald Trump on national television.

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7/30 @ 8:58 PM
TheDailyShow - #TDSBreakingNews Planned Parenthood website hacked. Should have used protection.

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7/30 @ 7:05 PM
TheDailyShow - #TDSBreakingNews NYC subway station hits 106 degrees. So the crazy man on the 1 train was right about the coming hellfire after all.

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7/30 @ 1:09 PM
TheDailyShow - Today on #YourMonthofZen - 2012 versions of Louis C.K., @robcorddry and Herman Cain! http://t.co/mlCe41wpAb

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7/30 @ 10:09 AM
TheDailyShow - #TDSBreakingNews There have been 132 Confederate flag rallies since June. With a perfect, 100% Truck Nutz attendance rate.

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7/29 @ 10:30 PM
TheDailyShow - Tonight! Jon went to the White House and all he got was this lousy news cycle.

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7/29 @ 9:12 PM
TheDailyShow - A final chat with our resident historian. https://t.co/uQBLOZ20u0

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7/29 @ 8:30 PM
TheDailyShow - #TDSBreakingNews Study: Social media may affect teens' mental health. Counterpoint: w/o iPhone they'll "LITERALLY DIE! GET OUT OF MY ROOM!"

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7/29 @ 7:30 PM
TheDailyShow - #TDSBreakingNews Trump says he'd tap Palin for cabinet post. She hunts wild animals; he has one on his head. This can only end tragically.

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7/29 @ 5:30 PM
TheDailyShow - Full ep - Obama visits Africa, @hasanminhaj and @jordanklepper make Jon answer fans' questions, and Tom Cruise. http://t.co/F5zqmKW8rt

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7/29 @ 10:36 AM
TheDailyShow - #TDSBreakingNews Porn websites visited 250,000 times on UK parliament computers. Mostly went to UK porn site "Crumpets and Crotches"

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7/28 @ 10:50 PM
TheDailyShow - Tonight! You probe Jon Stewart and he has to take it. #JonStewartsAskhole

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7/28 @ 8:36 PM
TheDailyShow - #TDSBreakingNews Putin: FIFA president Sepp Blatter deserves Nobel Prize. Sounds like someone's planning a little Nobel Prize theft!

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7/28 @ 7:00 PM
TheDailyShow - #TDSBreakingNews Trump worth 1/3 of what he says he is. But actually contains 300% of the bullshit, so it evens out.

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7/28 @ 6:00 PM
TheDailyShow - Donate now for a chance to win tickets to Jon's final episode. Proceeds go to @NYC4A. http://t.co/iQcwzgTghF http://t.co/dR4Lr4iTn1

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7/28 @ 4:20 PM
TheDailyShow - Full ep - The FBI warns of ISIS's Twitter capabilities, and Huckabee likens the Iran nuclear deal to the Holocaust. http://t.co/Yu4E5PGzLQ

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7/28 @ 10:07 AM
TheDailyShow - #TDSBreakingNews Boehner cries during interview w/ Golf Channel. Apologizes, says he's been in an "emotional sandtrap" lately.

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7/27 @ 10:50 PM
TheDailyShow - Tonight! Mike Huckabee says something stupid. The world reels from lack of surprise.

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7/27 @ 9:07 PM
TheDailyShow - #TDSBreakingNews Dennis Rodman endorses Trump for president. Adding "when have I been wrong about a leader?"

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7/27 @ 7:10 PM
TheDailyShow - #TDSBreakingNews Study: Americans now eating fewer calories. Unfortunately eating lots of calories was America's primary form of exercise.

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7/27 @ 5:30 PM
TheDailyShow - Exclusive: Watch Jon's warm-up routine. It's like being at the show, but better, b/c you don't have to wear pants! http://t.co/VnUUi2XliL

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7/26 @ 1:55 PM
TheDailyShow - #TDSBreakingNews Obama gives Shell go-ahead in Arctic despite fears of oil spills. Massive multi-year cleanups will create hundreds of jobs.

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7/25 @ 5:55 PM
TheDailyShow - #TDSBreakingNews Amazon shares surge past Wal-mart. No wonder, everyone knows Americans hate being greeted. #GetWithItWalmart

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7/24 @ 2:33 PM
TheDailyShow - Full ep - Donald Trump is still running for president, Jon looks back at his Jewishness, and Ta-Nehisi Coates. http://t.co/vGAhqnZnoW

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7/24 @ 11:28 AM
TheDailyShow - Buy one of Jon's suits! Proceeds go to @achillesintl. He won't need them anymore. @ebaygivingworks http://t.co/eORRktWogS

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7/24 @ 10:38 AM
TheDailyShow - #TDSBreakingNews Study: Teens having less sex. Don't have the attention span for it. #ADHD

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7/23 @ 10:39 PM
TheDailyShow - Tonight! Sure, Trump's fun to ridicule, but... That's the end of the sentence. Trump's fun to ridicule.

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7/23 @ 8:38 PM
TheDailyShow - #TDSBreakingNews NASA discovers 12 new potential earth-like planets. Big business says, "See? We'll be FINE," increases pollution.

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7/23 @ 7:38 PM
TheDailyShow - #TDSBreakingNews Papal approval drops in U.S. Pope's message of unselfish love approx. as popular as when Jesus pitched it.

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7/23 @ 10:10 AM
TheDailyShow - #TDSBreakingNews Mark Zuckerberg now 9th richest person in the world. Tom from MySpace lives in a dumpster behind the Dairy Queen.

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7/22 @ 10:50 PM
TheDailyShow - Tonight! Let's make a deal! And then talk about what a garbage deal it was. #Iran

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7/22 @ 8:30 PM
TheDailyShow - #TDSBreakingNews Study: Too much TV can raise the risk of Alzheimer's. But as a Viacom property, we say it's worth it!

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7/22 @ 7:20 PM
TheDailyShow - #TDSBreakingNews Schwarzenegger: Climate change is not science fiction. "But science fiction can solve it!" he yelled from the time machine.

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7/22 @ 1:28 PM
TheDailyShow - “I can say that Iran will not be able to get a nuclear weapon. We’ve cut off the four major pathways… https://t.co/3oZ8RVBg64

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