comedy.broadwayworld.com

DANIELTOSH on Twitter

Back to Main...

http://www.twitter.com/DANIELTOSH
3/24 @ 10:30 PM
danieltosh - good night. here’s the link to the #toshroast so you can memorize it word for word. http://t.co/c4egJQXm8K

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/24 @ 10:25 PM
danieltosh - here’s a bunch of your tweets that i didn’t think were funny enough for my tv show. http://t.co/HDupflmEzN

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/24 @ 9:59 PM
danieltosh - i heard you was talkin' trash. hold me back i'm bout to spaz. #tosh

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/24 @ 9:47 PM
danieltosh - #toshroast is tonight! thanks to all who wrote horrible things. i know you only tease me because you respect my comedy. see you in 13.

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/24 @ 9:35 PM
danieltosh - bitch, who do you love?

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/24 @ 9:16 PM
danieltosh - now i'm four-five minutes from wildin' #tosh

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/24 @ 9:00 PM
danieltosh - tonight’s #tosh is my citizen kane, my mona lisa, my hit me baby one more time, my nights in rodanthe, my jumbaco, my ronald reagan.

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/24 @ 5:38 PM
danieltosh - “tonight’s redemption on #tosh made me the biggest wwe wrestling fan” says @joerogan (he didn’t, but he might)

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/24 @ 5:21 PM
danieltosh - all your #toshroast tweets will be on tonight and my bieber jokes that comedy central tried to ban.

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/24 @ 5:15 PM
danieltosh - “they” are calling tonight’s #tosh the best episode in the past 3 years!!

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/24 @ 1:30 PM
danieltosh - by the end of may, there will be ZERO comics hosting late night talk shows. no one will be watching, but at least no one will be offended.

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/21 @ 3:05 AM
danieltosh - i enjoyed ryan reynolds in 'the voices' very much. that is all.

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/18 @ 1:10 PM
danieltosh - being mean to me is easy. good luck being mean and funny. best tweets get on next week’s sode. #toshroast

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/17 @ 10:31 PM
danieltosh - now's your chance to roast me. next week i'll read the best (cruelest) on air. i won't let comedy central censor you. #toshroast

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/17 @ 9:59 PM
danieltosh - have them turn up the volume at your local pub. it’s #tosh time!

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/17 @ 9:37 PM
danieltosh - 23 minutes to get your affairs in order. and by that i mean rank all the affairs you’re having. #tosh

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/17 @ 8:37 PM
danieltosh - for god’s sake @united please address @kylekinane’s complaints or i will pretend to conduct the largest boycott your company has ever seen!!

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/17 @ 8:24 PM
danieltosh - find the ‘freddy got fingered’ reference in tonight's new #tosh sode and win a box of teddy grahams! #notchocolate

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/17 @ 8:10 PM
danieltosh - i’ve become so wealthy thanks to you, my dumb fans, that from time to time i only use one side of the q-tip. #blessed

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/17 @ 1:57 PM
danieltosh - ...a celebrity thinking people actually care about what they write on twitter.

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/17 @ 1:56 PM
danieltosh - ...being disgusted that your toilet has poop in it after you take a poop.

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/17 @ 1:56 PM
danieltosh - ...getting upset at the movie 'double jeopardy' for not being 100% legally accurate.

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/17 @ 1:56 PM
danieltosh - getting offended by what people write to you on twitter is like...

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/17 @ 1:16 PM
danieltosh - if you’ve ever asked to take a photo with someone and then posed pointing at them, you will never matter.

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/17 @ 1:08 PM
danieltosh - they say burying your child is the toughest thing a parent will ever have to do. i say sitting through the movie ‘cake’ is.

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/10 @ 10:30 PM
danieltosh - everyone wins when i go off the air. see you next week. #tosh

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/10 @ 10:00 PM
danieltosh - the reason the show keeps getting better is because of the talented, dedicated people who watch me do all the work. #tosh now!

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/10 @ 9:30 PM
danieltosh - big get on #tosh tonight - it’s @theshoenice! you have 30 minutes to familiarize yourself with his eating habits. http://t.co/CAziizFYAh

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/10 @ 9:19 PM
danieltosh - don’t believe the liberal media lies. only god can cancel @brickleberry, and he’s too busy smiting. new episodes coming soon!

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/10 @ 7:25 PM
danieltosh - just to be clear, every show that has “tons of buzz on social media” is failing. new episode tonight. let’s get #tosh trending, team!

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/10 @ 4:55 PM
danieltosh - smdh, chip kelly just bought out my contract. i’ll be hosting the show from philly for the next 2 seasons, with an option to kill myself.

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/10 @ 1:22 PM
danieltosh - hey apple, call my people. i’m curious to know what the magic number is for me to start wearing a stupid watch.

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/7 @ 11:09 AM
danieltosh - it's the cuddling afterwards that i find so disturbing. #getadoghousealready http://t.co/qerZ5LVWZ9

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/5 @ 1:32 AM
danieltosh - hassan whiteside is straight up the next neon boudeaux!!! #bluechips #heatnation

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/3 @ 10:30 PM
danieltosh - no more insults until next week or i will have you fired. #tosh

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/3 @ 10:00 PM
danieltosh - your life is about to have meaning again. let's live tweet a clip show. #tosh

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/3 @ 9:31 PM
danieltosh - tonight’s #tosh will make you rich!!! see you in 29 minutes.

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/3 @ 8:55 PM
danieltosh - what excuse could you possibly have for not watching new #tosh tonight?

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/3 @ 5:15 PM
danieltosh - i can't tell you how much your thoughts and prayers have meant. it’s been overwhelming for me & my family. thank you. #lakehousezoningissues

Retweet | Reply | Link

3/3 @ 1:09 PM
danieltosh - dear @mickyarison, please buy the miami dolphins and put pat riley in charge.

Retweet | Reply | Link


Next Page >>

 


Become a Fan, Follower & Subscriber