I actually linked through this at Pam's when I was looking up stuff on GLAAD v Sherri Shepherd, but this is so redonk it deserved its own thread. The link itself is actually a Kenyan blogger, repeating something posted in this book. Some of the signs to look for and observe are: 1) Men are very territorial, if another man enters their space or violates their square, he'll move away or take a step back, if he doesn't move this might be a sign that he's open for getting closer. Notice if they brush shoulders or lean over across each other touching ever so slightly – like lovers do. 2) Is he effeminate? Some men slowly move into a more feminine stand, or pose. They might start wearing their belts tighter to show their shape, or it might just be the flinging up of a finger or how they place their feet when standing. Or they may start wearing footies around the house and walking on their toes. It's doubtful they'll slip and do any of this. 3) If he holds eye contact too long with a man, or if he holds on to his hand after shaking it, or if he prolongs hugging a man past the greeting stage. 4) If you notice him watching other men just a little bit too much, or if he raises his voice a bit too loud when he's with you and other men are present to get their attention. Does he seem to follow a man to the restroom at a restaurant or club? 5) Check out his friends, how do they act with each other, are they masculine or working hard to appear so, do they talk on the phone a bit too much for two adult men? 6) How does he sleep at night, what position does he sleep in? Does he sleep like a woman, or like a man? What does he talk about in his sleep? 7) Has he been single just a bit too long? What is his history with women? Why did they break up, Does he go on long drives alone? Is he cruising? Discuss homosexuality with him, see how he reacts. If he reacts too strongly on the negative or too violently – perhaps he's protesting so strongly to throw you off track so he isn't suspect himself. 9) Discuss child molestation with him and see how he feels about it,ask him was he ever molested, does he know any men who were, and how does he think it affects a man's sexuality. 10) You can touch his rectum to see if he has those tell-tale humps on his anus from having it stretched open with a penis. Then later on ask him if he's ever had hemorrhoids really bad. 11) Check his underwear for tiny streaks of bloodstains, or clear stains which may be semen. There may not be any because men on the DL are usually `Tops' so they can justify themselves as not being Gay. 12) Chart your sex life. Note how often you and he are intimate andif you're always the one who has to start the process rolling. Is he in a hurry? Is it a problem for him getting an maintaining an erection, when it never used to be that difficult? 13) If he has a lot of unexcused absences, and if he's out later than he usually is a couple of times a week. He might be cruising or stopping by a Gay after-hour joint after his regular activities. 14) If he likes anal stimulation, or likes to have his prostrate massaged – and asks/begs for it. 15) If he wants to have anal sex more than vaginal sex, or skips your vagina altogether. 16) If he asks you to "toss his salad" and you agree, and his legs go up too quickly, he's probably used to doing it. 17) Some women get their Gay friend to "hit" on their man to see if he goes for it (Not good). 1 If he asks you to strap on a dildo and do him in the rear this may be a hint of what he's used to. Don't starts accusing until you know you've seen several signs, discussed it with a counselor or some other trained professional.Rants and Raves of a Kenyan Gay Man
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